User:Qw3rty!/100+ Reasons why I hate BO2

Inspired by Smuffs page, i decided to make my own.

After playing the first Black Ops, i nearly lost my hope in the series, "Never again", i told myself after enduring hours of playing Treyarch shit pile of an excuse they so happily named Call of Duty: Black Ops. I nearly lost my faith in the series, MW3 happened to restore it, and i decided to give BO2 a chance, i was excited for the Campaign, but i had low expectations to what the MP was going to be like.

The feeling of absolute anger cant describe how much this game bothers me. The low expectations i had for this game were not even nearly met in this heaping pile of super shit Treyarch happily named Black Ops II. The only suitable part of this game is the Campaign, Zombies has been zombified into this literally decaying game mode that was once crowned the Prestigious title Nazi Zombies. Multiplayer has dug the darkest pit from both Treyarch and the COD Community that has shattered by hopes of this series ever regaining fun.

'''Note this is my personal opinion of the faults in this game. You have your own, and i have mine, and respect my ability to have an opinion'''.

Multiplayer

 * 1) The MP7. One of the most over used guns in Modern Warfare 3, and Treyarch has managed to boost up the performance of this horrible OP weapon to Apotheosis.MP7_Menu_Icon_BOII.png
 * 2) UAV spam. Despite all of the awful ideas Treyarch have ever come up with, making Ghost the lastly unlocked item in multiplayer guarantees any nit wit with luck and a SMG can get a UAV then totally ass fuck the remnants of what once was my team.
 * 3) The Skorpian EVO III. The futuristic version of the Pissy noob sprayer from Treyarch first game. People running with Rapid Fire turn any enemy they encounter into bloody swiss cheese, before most of my Assault Rifles even have a chance to register a bullet that wont hit.
 * 4) PDW57. Treyarch nerfs this gun, doesnt do anything, makes it more community appealing. Good job!
 * 5) MSMC. Another super SMG. Out classing most of my weapons in terms of damage, recoil and range, this gun will murder me 85% of the time.
 * 6) SMG sniping. Never in a Call of Duty game that i have played have i ever been out classed at long range by an SMG while i am sniping them. This. Should. Never. Happen!
 * 7) Lag Compensation. Why of FUCKING WHY. Treyarch have gone to hell and back to fucking do their best to make this already horrible game worse. Half of my bullets never register and i can get killed .7 second back in time. FUN FUCKING TIMES.
 * 8) Utterly the shittiest maps since fucking ever. SMGs are made for almost every fucking map, why? No one knows but the shit wits are Treyarch :D!!!!!111!!!!111!!11!11!
 * 9) Hijacked. The worst fucking dare even called map in Call of Duty History. The worst spawns of a single map. There is no reason this map should be the way it is with every fuckhead with a CQB SMG run and demolish as much as they do.
 * 10) Pistol Damage. The fact that my Assault Rifle can be out matched at anything but long range by a Pistol is bullcrap.
 * 11) DSR50 Damage. Okay i get it, 1 hit 1 kill to the torso, but the fucking arms? Really? And it fucking fires super quick, so even if they miss, you are utterly fucked.
 * 12) R870 MCS Rate of Fire. 0.5 seconds between pumps? What in the literal Fuck!? Its a shotgun! Nerf the ROF to atleast a second like the KSG. That thing is atleast fair and fun.
 * 13) Score Streaks: Why would they make it back to the point of where getting kills earns you points to your next killstreak?
 * 14) Overly difficult camo challenges. 30 Revenge metals with a pistol? Come on. I mean you (Treyarch) took out the challenging Camos in MW2, now you try to unfuck it, but still fucks it up.
 * 15) Emblem editors. OH LOOK AT THE LITTLE PENIS. LOVELY. Fucking only having 100 customized pre made emblems that you must unlock, and the other ones, means i get shittier emblems, less innovation, and guess what, MORE DICKS!!!!
 * 16) Bad AR mechanichs. Take a book from IW. They make good ARs. Learn from them Treyarch you dumbasses.
 * 17) Assault Shield. Never in MW2/3 have i gotten killed from people shooting into my shield and killing me. How in the fuck do you fuck up something as unfuckable as the bloody damn RIOT SHIELD.!!!!?
 * 18) FAL OSW/SMR. Take a book from the MK14, 2 shot to kill should have high recoil, low magazine size, and bad attachments, you dont make the fucking FAL god like! Plus the fully automatic FAL asswips are bullshiting me. Reduce the range on that bull crap.
 * 19) Spawns. Spawns. SPAWNS. SPAWWWWNS.SPAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWNSS. Play on Hijacked Demolition/Domination and enjoy either the crushing victory or ravaging defeat.
 * 20) The SCAR-H. The worst AR in the game. Terrible recoil for long range, piss poor ROF for close range. Why? Because Treyarch fucks you thats why
 * 21) Unlock Tokens. Why in the world am i not able to unlock everything in a single prestige level?
 * 22) Lack of Custom Game mode playlist. Infected, Drop Zone and All or Nothing were super fun. Why would they not include these? They arnt even in the custom game private matches.
 * 23) Lack of Nuketown in core map playlist, i dont want to have to play Chaos Moshpit fuckfest to play Nuketown.
 * 24) Grenade blast radius. WTF, fucking small grenades are bloody stronger than my Launchers! I have to waste my Tier 1 perk just to survive these.
 * 25) Grenade indicator, there is almost zero chance of surviving being in the grenade blast radius. Unless you waste your Tier 1 perk to counter explosions before you get killed by an SMG
 * 26) Claymores are back to near instant explosion. FUCKING WOO :DDDDDD
 * 27) Sensor Grenades, nearly useless, people use Cold Blooded most of the time and the explosion on these things kills the user if they are near by it.
 * 28) Prestige Master glitchers.
 * 29) Crossbow, might as well remove the splash damage, cause it cant kill for shit unless its hardcore.
 * 30) Wildcards. HEY WANT MORE WEAPUN ATTUCHMUNTS? HERE YA GO? WANT MORE NADES? HERE YA GO!
 * 31) Hard Wired. Why is this even a perk? No one uses it. Hard Wired Perk Icon BOII.png
 * 32) Snipers. Why the fuck does it take 40 levels to unlock the next sniper?
 * 33) RC-XD is back! BUT DONT WORRY IT ONLY TAKES 25 more POINTS TO GET IT
 * 34) Lightning Strike, WOO LETS SHOW EVERYONE'S POSITION ON THE MAP!
 * 35) Dragonfire Dragonfire Menu icon BOII.png. This thing cant kill for shit.
 * 36) Lack of moving maps. Cargo and Express are the fun ones.
 * 37) WEAPON DLC WEAPON DLC WEAPON DLC WEAPON DLC WEAAAAPON DLLLLCCC!!! FUCK NO! AND ITS AN SMG!
 * 38) Xbox gets DLC first. Thanks Activision
 * 39) Auto Aim noob scope. Now everyone with a FAL can find me! JOY.
 * 40) Lack of Underbarrel Shotgun attachment, that thing was fun and they took it away
 * 41) Complete overuse of SMGs, if you haven't inferred that already.
 * 42) Hip Firing. Now with the super fast rate of fire on the weapons, ADS in most of these maps for CQB can be dominated without even aiming.
 * 43) Bullet Penetration, even at mid range, SMGs can kill me through seemingly unkillable walls.
 * 44) Treyarch shitting in your face although they adjusted their statement in a later patch, its still disrespectful that this dude claims that there is math behind everything in the game that prevents balancing, with logic, you can assume there was "very good math" when BO1 was released and the Famas was thought to be ok!? OK on to the next one.
 * 45) The lack of Sleight of Hand WaW Perk Fastreload.png and Steady Aim Steady Aim pro perk MW3.png. But thats okay. We here at Treyarch now think that weapon attachments are much more fun, so we made Fast Mag Fast Mag Menu icon BO2.png and LASERSS, pew pew!Laser Sight Menu icon BO2.png
 * 46) When i seldom use grenades, throwing a frag grenade at a corner will 50% of the time result in the grenade refusing to follow basic physics and come right back at to me despite the angle of throwing. Fucking boomerang grenade!
 * 47) View Profile mid game. WHEN DO YOU EVEN NEED TO VIEW PROFILE DURING YOUR MULTIPLAYER GAME MODE? IT JUST TAKES YOU OUT OF THE GAME FOR 10 SECONDS.
 * 48) Quickscoping. Much more dangerous with the gun that cycles the bolt super fast and kills to the limbs. >_>
 * 49) Absolute shit team mates. It seems as CoD games progress, any enemy that i face off against has god like skills of hearing, eyesight, and magic. My team mates have seemingly devolved into semi-conscious rocks.
 * 50) Search Preferences. This is shit in zombies too. But worse in MP. Ever since i put the preference on best, i get into more laggy games than on fucking normal!
 * 51) PDW 57. Take a fucking book from the P90, high magazine for a SMG? GIVE IT ACTUAL FUCKING RECOIL!!!!
 * 52) What is with the lack of recoil on the SMGs? WTF is Treyarch thinking? Did they not have enough people using the Uzi in BO1? BOO FUCKING HOO TREYARCH
 * 53) Hardpoint. Lets not mix up the hardpoint spawns and put them on a GOD DAMN FIXED PATH. Its fun when the entire enemy team is already at the next Hardpoint as soon as i get to the current one.
 * 54) Walrus noob: "Add on how the Grenade launcher sucks', 'they suck."
 * 55) Normal noob: "add on the knife range and OHL conbat knife" :D
 * 56) FLAK JACKET RETURNS MO FOS AND IT STILL MAKES YOU INVINCIBLE TO EXPLOSIONS!
 * 57) Lack of Pro perks.
 * 58) C4 Still has the blast radius of a small portable throwable nuke. C4 Menu Icon BOII.png
 * 59) Give me a C-o-m-b-a-t A-x-e. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT SPELL GUISE!!! THAAAAATS RIGHT! TOMAHAWK.
 * 60) EMP grenade have a blast radius that can go through walls unlike MW3. It also doesnt instantly fucking kill enemy scorestreaks since it has to be thrown ON THE FUCKING GROUND TO WORK
 * 61) Lack of M1911 in MP. Am i right or am i right. Thats right, you dont get to say which one i am right :D.
 * 62) Executioner. I've seen silverware more dangerous than this POS
 * 63) You cant take 2 secondaries into the game.
 * 64) Extended Clip. I want Extended Mags, not 2 or 4 more bullets in my magazine.
 * 65) Why doesnt the Ballista SHARE ITS IRON SIGHTS ATTACHMENT!
 * 66) Why doesnt the FAL have super fucking recoil on Full Auto?
 * 67) BRING BACK THE FUCKING FIRE. I WANT FLAMETHROWERS. I WANT UNDERBARREL FLAMETHROWERS. NAPALM STRIKES. SCORCH THE FUCKING EARTH. WE'LL BURN 'EM OUT!

Zombies

 * 1) Oh my fucking god where to begin. First thing that i hate is THE FUCKING SHIT LAG. I cant even finish 1 game up to round 10 before Treyarch decides to pull the plug. Its fun trying to play zombies knowing that you are not going to be able to get far!
 * 2) Host Migrations. Only 1 time did any Host Migration ever succeed. But not it fucking fails every time. Its fun when the host leaves and a system they made to keep the game going is broken as shit.
 * 3) Not having 4 parts in Tranzit for the Bus. I want the Galvaknucles, but i want to stay alive if im on the bust. Decisions decisions.DenizenFull.png
 * 4) HAVING 1 MAP AND CALLING SINGLE SECTIONS OF THE MAPS ACTUAL MAPS. Thats like fucking taking part of a bridge, coping it, laying it into 3rds and not finishing it but saying it is finished.
 * 5) Stupid Screaming Fuckers Why do they have such giant fucking faces? What is this? Chernobyl?
 * 6) Lava. Its raining its pouring, lava is coming from the dead mourning.
 * 7) Fog. Whats it good for. absolutely nothing!
 * 8) The Avogadro. Who would've thought Treyarch could make a crappier boss?EMP_Grenade_Menu_Icon_BOII.png
 * 9) EMP Grenades. Dont you just love that your team mates can turn off perks? I sure dont.
 * 10) Misty. Wtf is this? Farms gone Wild? Why would she need giant boobs besides for Treyarch to fap themselves over.
 * 11) Marlton. If i wanted to listen to a nasally nerd talking, i wouldn't,
 * 12) Russman. Lets make a stereotypical annoying racist old black fellow now shall we fellow white developers? HAIL TREYACH, HAIL TREYACH. SHNIEL. INSERT MORE PROPAGANDA!
 * 13) Samuel Stuhlinger. Joy, another annoying psycopath that isnt Richtofen. I've had enough of his crap.
 * 14) Pack a Punching multiple times. Here at Treyarch, we take you excellent community idea such as a second Pack a Punch for increased damage and we say "Fuck that, lets just change the attachments!"
 * 15) M16A1. Were you guys trying to look not lazy and just rename it M16A1? With the same PaP as the M16?
 * 16) AK 74u. Yay, its still crap, but atleast we know how crap it is after 2 years. At least they didnt change the PaP name so we know how lazy they are.
 * 17) Buildable Pieces. Yaaaay, now if one of my team mates takes the piece and never puts it on the workbench, its just about lost forever! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
 * 18) Perma Perks. Is it permanent perks or persistent perks? I dont fucking know. You probably have stopped reading this one and gone to the next one, for those of you still around, heres a cookie. You probably only stayed for the link.
 * 19) ANOTHER GOD DAMN SUPER FUCKING EASTER EGG. THIS TIME ITS A TROPHY!!!!!!!
 * 20) The pit of lava in the Power Plant fun times burning my ass to a crisp over a slightly missed and crappily made jump.
 * 21) Tombstone Soda Tombstone Soda Icon.png. Rest in Peace, like your hopes and dreams of having fun in this game. Its fun because after an unknown or random reason, your tombstone wont show up!
 * 22) Dumb ass fucking semi-sentient rocks humans i unhappily call team mates.
 * 23) TEDD the bus Driver, now all my stupid team mates can fuck with him and get us kicked off the bus!
 * 24) Richtofens Voice. Now that hes the announcer, the horror in this game mode is long gone, pretty much gone ever since W@W. He just sounds silly/annoying.
 * 25) Turbines. Zombies sometimes love them, sometimes hate them and try and bitch slap them to death.
 * 26) RECYCLED ZOMBIE SOUNDS. 2 years in development. I guess some things never change.
 * 27) Jet Gun What an awful piece of humble shit. Make a buildable that sucks zombies towards you, then breaks leaving you with a facefull of zombies slapping your shit.
 * 28) No new/cool functional Wonder Weapon. The Jet Gun is utter shit. Not even worth getting the pieces for.
 * 29) Bus. bus bus bus, the laggiest fucking mechanic in the game. You cant go prone, the back seat is too high, you cant walk into your team mate without lagging.
 * 30) Dubstep in zombies. This is just up to personal preference, and i preferably would listen to two rocks grinding than dubstep.
 * 31) Why isnt she making the zombie music?
 * 32) Lack of more future weapons. Instead, treyarch decided to keep a fuck ton of old weapons instead of letting us have fun with newer weapons.
 * 33) Changing the sounds on old weapons, if they're not gonna give us cool future weapons, at least we know they half assed the bullet sounds.
 * 34) RPD is fucking the exact same skin from MW2.
 * 35) Nuketown Zombies. Will PS3/PC/WII Me players ever get Nuketown Zombies? The world may never know!
 * 36) CIA. Reused models from USSD.
 * 37) CDC. Reused models from Rebirth.
 * 38) Did i already mention Marlton? I did? Well i still fucking hate him, he sounds like a bitch.
 * 39) SMR. It is just utter shit. The M1911 is much better even without pack a punching. Half of the bullets never hit the intended zombies because the ADS is apparently broken.
 * 40) Barret M82. This is just pathetic. It sounds like a bb gun. And its still shit.
 * 41) DSR 50. Woo 4 bullets. Not going to get much done aren't ya?War_Machine_Side_View_BOII.png
 * 42) War Machine. Lord all fucking Allah this is crap.
 * 43) No minigun in Zombies. Now how am i supposed to kill these arsehole zombies.
 * 44) No bloody damn PHD Floppah Wd phd flopper.png. Half of my deaths in survival are from fucking fall damage.
 * 45) Who the fuck invented the idea of fucking double zombie bitch slaps? Thats bull crap. A zombie can down my in half a second from a stupid game mechanic.
 * 46) 3 meter zombie bitch slap range. I just got fucking downed on the bus after a zombie came onboard and double bitch slapped me from meters away. Thanks Treyarch.
 * 47) Zombies spawning infinietly out of the ground. By far one of the most annoying zombie features. I like my zombies behind windows.

Campaign

 * 1) Alright Cocksuckers, you see this cock sucker here? This guy, is a total. Fucking. Cock sucker. His name is Raul Cocksucker Menendez. Now if any of you cock suckers want to stop being a cock sucker, go find this cock sucker and bring him to me so i can call him a cock sucker then get shot by this cock sucker COCKSUCKA!
 * 2) David is fucking acting like he is trying to get seduced by Menedez in Suffer With Me.
 * 3) Your challenges reset their stats if you want to replay the campaign. Jolly good idea mates!
 * 4) Flying the Jet in Cordis Die is fucking stupid. I crashed into 10 different buildings (dont worry i didnt fucking die some how) because the fucking controls are inverted.
 * 5) As Yahtzee said, nearly everyone that isnt fucking white in this game is a turrururst! If you're not white you either go through some sort of horrible traumae, die, or end up being one of menendes's little bitches.
 * 6) 2 Billion people believe in this Cordis Die crap. Keep it in church treyarch!
 * 7) Why the fuck does Hudson sound like a total bitch now?
 * 8) SAAAAAAVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMBBBBBBBBBBIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
 * 9) The god awful music you get to listen to when you start up the game and watch the little girl get burnt like bacon. Alex Mason 1980 BOII.png
 * 10) How the hell did Woods survive again? I forgot since they didnt fucking clairify how in the game.
 * 11) The fact that it took mason 30 years to grab his fucking nuts and say, hell, lets go visit woods and my son who i have had no concact with and no care for since i've been sleeping with 5$ hookers for years.
 * 12) David Mason is such a little bitch. He falls out of a tree, bitches at his dad for trying to push him, then begs him like a bitch for him not to leave, then he gets seduced by Menendez some how which isnt clairfied at all.
 * 13) Hudson some how manages to turn into the bad guy in this game.
 * 14) Fucking Horratio Nelson of Panama or what ever his fat ass little name is should've had his ass busted a cap in 2 missions ago.
 * 15) Reusing skin models but changing the gun sounds. Oh so the gun looks the same 12 years later but sounds different? My oh my how time flies.

General Issues

 * 1) ROLLING FUCKING SOUND DROP OUTS. Instead of listening to the game, i get this piercing sound of aliens fucking asking me, "whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy", but the words are being spoken through a garbage disposal set on fire by Satan's mighty poop hole.

Comments

 * Despite not agreeing with a lot of this, I love this. 02:44, January 4, 2013 (UTC)
 * So mad it's hilarious. Flammenwerfer9000 (talk) 08:03, January 4, 2013 (UTC)
 * Oh God, please be sarcasm....... Kylet357 (talk) 23:51, January 4, 2013 (UTC)
 * I loved reading this, it's funny even if you don't agree with some/most of the points, yet serious criticism at the same time. 04:56, January 5, 2013 (UTC)
 * I laughed more than I should have. All humour aside, who would submit themselves to the torture that is playing this game's multiplayer? Like, seriously?.-05:06, January 5, 2013 (UTC)
 * Beautiful, very good in humor and does have some good points that are problems with the game. Also the song is hilarious to listen to while reading this. 05:12, January 5, 2013 (UTC)
 * I couldn't agree much with this, but it's always nice to see a "100 things i hate about ____" You really made me laugh, also, may i say one thing to add to the Zombies part? The fact that most of the guns (SMR, M8A1, Barrett .50cal, DSR 50 ect.)) have a SPREAD? Even when ADS, your bullets still spray all over the place, it's annoying!   Pat   Hugz for GIR?   Vinyl Pat  The Mixmaster  19:36, January 6, 2013 (UTC)
 * Still beats MW3, but a good read nontheless. *sips tea*. --Ebon Shadowshot (Talk) (Contributions) 20:00, January 6, 2013 (UTC)

Videos