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This article is a list of quotes, that characters recite from time to time, from the fifth Zombies map Kino der Toten.

Note: Weapon specific quotes (except Wonder Weapons) are only heard in the Black Ops version.

Tank Dempsey Edit

"No power, no glory."
— At the beginning.


"Aw, are you freakin' kidding me? No power!"
— At the beginning.


"Well well well. Look's like there ain't no power."
— At the beginning.


"Gonna have to get the power on, it's like déjà vu all over again."
— At the beginning.


"Yep, *sigh* just as I suspected. We need to get the power on."
— At the beginning.


"No power. How original."
— Beginning a match


"Get back, you reekass nasty squag!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Back off, meatmouth!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You smell like a pool of shit, freakbag!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Too close, brain-maggot!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Move it! This ain't cuddle time!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You get any closer, I'll gonna have to introduce you to my mother!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Thank you! Drive-thru!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Look at that mess I made...Oorah."
— After killing lots of zombies in a row.


"I gotta give ya credit zombie, you got no quit in ya!"
— Upon getting a kill.


"Die! Again! Bonebag!"
— Upon killing a legless/footless zombie.


"You're buried for good now!"
— Upon killing a legless/footless zombie.


"Stay dead, cheesehead!"
— Upon killing a legless/footless zombie.


"Finally put down where you belong!"
— Upon killing a legless/footless zombie.


"Uh-uh! Not a chance, stumpy!"
— Upon killing a legless/footless zombie.


"Motherless flesh-addict!"
— After a knife kill.


"I'm gonna do a jig in your insides, freakbag!"
— After a knife kill.


"Eat my blade, maggot-sack!"
— After a knife kill.


"Taste this, bone-junkie!"
— After a knife kill.


"RARGH!!!"
— After a knife kill.


"Die, DIE!!!!"
— After a knife kill.


"Blew 'em to high hell!"
— After an explosive kill.


"AWESOME!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Not a chance, bonemaggots!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Hey, freak-bag! You need to learn when to die!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Gotta give him credit, he's not about to quit!"
— After an explosive kill.


"I guess they need to get blown up again!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Stupid undead flesh monkeys! You're dead already!"
— After an explosive kill.


"There's just somethin' so beautiful about blowin' shit up!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Blood-sucking gutter-slugs, are goin' out Dempsey-style!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Oo-fuckin'-rah!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Whoo-hoo! Haven't lost a touch!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Cracked him right in the dome!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"I should get twice the points for that shot!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Of course I skulled it! What else would I do?!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Slug to the skull! Nice."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Hope you can appreciate a perfect shot!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"No head. No dinner. Awesome."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Squish! Ha!!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Pop! Right in the head!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Can't eat meat without a mouth!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Argh! Fuck me that smells!"
— After killing a Nova Crawler.


"Hey, zombies! What time you got there? Oh ho ho, sorry."
— Upon shooting a zombie's limb.


"Can't swing without that arm, pus-brain!"
— Upon shooting a zombie's limb.


"Wow! Blew that clean off. Hehe."
— Upon shooting a zombie's limb.


"They don't hold together so well, do they? (Laughs)"
— Upon shooting a zombie's limb.


"I HATE these stumpy skin-jerking flesh-junkies!"
— Upon making a crawler.


"Oh, what was that noise?"
— When noticing a Nova Crawler.


"Uh-oh. Sounds like we got some new friends coming to the party!"
— When noticing a Nova Crawler.


"Ah, great! Now what!?"
— When noticing a Nova Crawler.


"Shit! Gutter-slugs!"
— When noticing a Nova Crawler.


"Creepy little slime-balls raining from the sky. Great."
— When noticing a Nova Crawler.


"Richtofen! Lay off the sauerkraut, man!"
— After killing a Nova Crawler.


"How do ya like that, creepy crawler!"
— After killing a Nova Crawler.


"Argh! Those things need to see the sunshine every once in a while!"
— After killing a Nova Crawler.


"It just... It just blew them all over the place! *laughs* Wow!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"I think I just sent that thing back to 1946!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Okay, woah! That was bad-ass!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Eat that, ya blood-drinkin' marro-monkeys!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Woo! What a blast!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"*in advertising voice* Killing zombies in one simple step! Batteries not included."
— When getting multiple kills with the Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Killing zombies since 1945! Ooh-Ra!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Die you undead flesh-whores!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Hey zombies, you're dying over here!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"More dead here than a goth party!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"You keep coming, I'll keep killing!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Look at'em all die! Steeerike!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"WOOHOO!!!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Oh yeah! Feel it, meat-sacks!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Sure, leave it up to me to kill'em all!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Kickin' ass and gettin' paid! Two of my favourite things."
— Upon multiple kills.


"If I keep this up, I'm gonna out of zombies."
— Upon multiple kills.


"Time to do the death dance, baby!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Meet Tank Dempsey! Your worst nightmare!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"You're done-sky, freak-sack!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Woah! That shit is far out, man. (Laughs)"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"You got lit up!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Here today, uh, gone today, too. (Laughs)"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Nope! No coming back from that."
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Oh yeah, That little dude is badass!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Get'em, monkey bones!."
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"That just never gets old."
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Oh-Raaah!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Always amazed of how cool this little guy is."
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Eat it, ya nasty squag!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Die, you undead flesh-addict!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"K to the I to the A, Zombitch!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him, reference to status K.I.A (Killed in Action)


"You had no chance, bonemonkey!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him


"Look out, freakbag! I bite back!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him


"Get off of me!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"L'eggo of my boots, stumpy!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Aw! You're gettin' pus all over my pants!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"You wanna lick my boots, freakbag?!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Knee-biting maggot!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Hand it with the humpy, stumpy!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Ah great... this again!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Bring on the dogs!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"I ain't gonna be any puppy's chew toy!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Time to put you down puppy-dog!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Fetch my grenade, devil voice!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Fuck you, Fido!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Down, boy!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"That's the last leg you'll ever hump!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Damn! That was hot!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Bad doggie!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Woah! It just blew up!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Fucker caught me napping!"
— When downed. He also says this quote in Der Riese.


"Man down, MAN DOWN!"
— When downed.


"My gun was jammed, else that wouldn't have happened."
— Said when being revived.


"Ahh shit, this is embarrassing!"
— When downed. He also says this quote in Der Riese.


"Someone wanna help me out here?"
— When downed.


"I hope you choke, meat-sack!"
— When downed. He also says this quote in Der Riese


"Lucky bone-sucking maggot-whores... they're really gonna pay now!"
— After being revived.


"Whatever... even a blind squirrel is right twice a day."
— After being revived.


"So they got a little lucky... WHAT?!"
— After being revived.


"Don't worry, just tripped."
— After being revived.


"Wait, I'm not turning yet, am I?"
— After being revived.


"Feeling light. Need the juice."
— When low ammo.


"Gonna need some juice soon!"
— When low ammo.


"Gotta get some more rounds."
— When low ammo.


"Need some more ammo."
— When out of ammo.


"Knee deep in zombie shit with no ammo! Glorious!"
— When out of ammo.


"Hey! Player! I need more ammo or we're going down!"
— When out of ammo.


"Hey! Player! Drop the chips and get me some ammo!"
— When out of ammo.


"I need to find some lead or I'm gonna get bored here!"
— When out of ammo.


"Damn! I'm outta juice!"
— When out of ammo.


"Gonna have to round up some rounds!"
— When low on ammo or out of ammo.


"I need more ammunition! Ahh!! Ahh!!"
— When low on ammo or out of ammo.


"The only thing better than an M16 is... well, two M16s!"
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"Ah, the M16. 5.56 millimeter magazine-fed gas-operated sweetness... just like me."
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"M16! Oh, it'll be a classic one day."
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"The M16 *kiss*! One of my favourite deadly weapons."
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"M-1-6. LOVE IT OR EAT IT!!!"
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"Oh-rah! Tank's best friend."
— After buying a M16 off the wall.


"Wonder if they'll even know what hit them. Ha ha!"
— After buying a M14 off the wall.


"Little gun, lots of holes!"
— Buying a SMG off the wall


"I'm gonna spill their guts all over the place, haha!"
— After buying an Olympia off the wall.


"Hell yes!"
— After buying a Stakeout off the wall.


"Nothing like a SMG! haha."
— After buying an AK-74u off the wall.


"Rapid-fire sweetness!"
— After buying a MPL off the wall.


"Hey zombie! Wanna try out my new gun?"
— Buying an SMG off the wall


"Time to meet the butcher, meat-bags!"
— Buying a Bowie Knife.


"I'm gonna CUT'EM UP!"
— Buying a Bowie Knife.


"Oh sweet! Bowie Knife!"
— Buying a Bowie Knife.


"It's time to get up and personal."
— Buying a Bowie Knife.


"Time to carve the turkey."
— Buying a Bowie Knife.


"Whoo! More shit to kill with!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"RE-JUICED!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"Ammunition on the house!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"Wait, we ARE keeping score?"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up. A possible reference to a quote made in Der Riese.


"Shoot 'em up!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"Sweet!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"That'll keep'em out for a few."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up


"Lock'em out."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"Our asses are covered....for a moment anyway."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"Aww, looks I'll have to wait till they break through again."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"(Laughs) Sorry, meat-bags. You're stuck outside."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"NUUUKE!"
— Upon getting a Nuke.


"KA-BOOOOM!"
— Upon getting a Nuke.


"BOOM FUCKING RAH, maggot-addicts!"
— Said upon getting a nuke.


"Eat that ya undead flesh monkeys!"
— Upon getting a Nuke.


"Man up Zombies, it's time to die."
— Upon getting Insta-Kill.


"Now, that's what I'm talkin' about!"
— Upon getting Insta-Kill.


"Ooh yeah, devil man!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Fire Sale! Oh, yeah!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Discounted killin'!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Clean up on Isle 5!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Fill your carts with discount parts!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Attention freakbags, everything must go!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale.


"Tastes like... fermented herring dipped in cat piss... blaugh."
— Upon drinking Quick Revive.


"Yeah, that hit the spot."
— Upon drinking Speed Cola.


"Reach for me, Jugger Girl. Oo-rah."
— Upon drinking Juggernog.


"Ugh, why is this stuff so damn chewy?"
— Upon drinking Double Tap Root Beer.


"Wonder if Richtofen has gears like those in his head."
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
"Man... I wish we could replace Richtofen with a hot chick, I'm getting lonely here."
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine. A possible reference to Richtofen's Grand Scheme.


"Yeah, Pack a punch, just like me."
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"C'mon Pack-a-Punch, you better hurry up!"
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine. A reference to how players have a limited time to pack-a-punch and grab their gun before they teleport again.


"(Grunts)"
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"Hell yeah, Dempsey gets an upgrade!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Bring it on, freak-sacks!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"It's about time!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Those undead flesh-sacks are gonna get CREAMED!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"They're about to get busted up real quick!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"A fire-breathing shotgun? Tears me up just thinking about it!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine


"A shotgun that breathes fire? Oh, you gotta be fuckin' killin' me!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"A fire-breathing shotgun!? BADASS!!!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"This has got to be the coolest thing I've even seen!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"As if I were badass enough already!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"So, let me get this straight. First, it blows a hole in their guts, then it burns the hell out of'em? Genius!"
— After getting Hades from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"(Laughs) Yeah, and I didn't think this couldn't get any more fun!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Time to die, bone-jaw!"
— After getting a Commando from Mystery Box.


"Little gun, lots of holes."
— After getting a Spectre from Mystery Box.


"This is gonna turn'em into red mist!"
— After getting a Spectre, SMG or possibly the Ray Gun from the Mystery Box.


"No more nice guy bone-jaw, I'm gonna kick your ass."
— After getting a SPAS-12 from Mystery Box.


"Time to make some noise!"
— After getting a HS-10 from Mystery Box.


"Oh ho, now this oughta be a good time."
— After getting a China Lake from Mystery Box.


"It's blow'em up buffet! And I'm packin' a main course!"
— After getting a Crossbow from Mystery Box.


"Hey, zombies! I have a little present for ya!"
— After getting a M72 LAW from Mystery Box.


"That's the ticket!"
— After getting a RPK from Mystery Box.


"I'm gonna open up on'em now!"
— After getting a HK21 from Mystery Box.


"This is good for taking names!"
— After getting a FAMAS from Mystery Box.


"It's slaughter time!"
— After getting a AUG from Mystery Box.


"I hope they're ready to get a gut full of slugs!"
— After getting a Galil from Mystery Box.


"You ready to party, gutter-slugs!?"
— After getting a G11 from Mystery Box.


"Can't wait to see what I can do with this! Oh-Rah!"
— After getting a Commando from Mystery Box.


"Rapid-fire lead-slinger! That's what I'm about!"
— After getting a RPK from Mystery Box.


"Well, I see the future hasn't changed anything! Fucking box!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"That's just craptastic!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"At least this thing doesn't cost real money!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"*Laughs* Almost nothin'!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Good thing I've always got my FISTS!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"If luck were a zombie, I'd kick his ass!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"I've got two guns!? AWESOME!"
— After getting a duel CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Oh yeah. Double the pain, freak-bags!"
— After getting a duel CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Two guns! I must be in heaven."
— After getting a duel CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Things just keep on gettin' better!"
— After getting a duel CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"(Sarcastic) Oh man, are you kiddin' me!? Two guns just ain't fair!"
— After getting a duel CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Monkey! So glad to see you again, buddy!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"Aww, what a cute little bundle of C4!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"Monkey! It's just about party time for you!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"Walkin' talkin' bundle ass kickin'! Why is that so familiar to me?"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"Those slimy flesh-bags are in for a wild time!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"*chuckles* Hey, Box! Fuck you!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"You keep on laughin', little girl! When I find you! You're grounded!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Man! Why does it always do that to me!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Ah, I didn't want a new gun anyway!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Oh, of course! I get the damn teddy bear!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Can't roll the bet if I can't place the dice!"
— When trying to use the Mystery Box without enough points.


"Check out those cool lights and buttons...Hehe."
— After receiving the Thundergun.


"Oh yeah! BOOM!!!"
— After receiving the Thundergun.


"I'm gonna rock'em like Thor!"
— After receiving the Thundergun.


"I'm gonna flatten the world with this! Oh-rah!"
— After receiving the Thundergun.


"Yup, this oughta bring the pain."
— After receiving the Thundergun.


"Oh, they are gonna dig this!!!"
— After Receiving the Ray Gun.


"(In a taunting voice) I got the Ray Gun! (Normal) Awesome!"
— After Receiving the Ray Gun.


"Alright Ray, it's you and me against the world."
— After receiving the Ray Gun.


"I love me the Ray Gun!"
— After Receiving the Ray Gun.


"I'm gonna make'em squirm!"
— After Receiving the Ray Gun.


"Sweet! Ray Gun!"
— After Receiving the Ray Gun.


"Nice shot, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"Beautiful!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"Perfect! As I would expect from a soldier like you!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"Keep it up, Takeo! You're gonna be USMC honored!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"Do it again, Tak!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"Oh, you turned it's head inside out! OORAH!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot.


"We're coming, Takeo!"
— When Takeo is swarmed.


"Hang in, Tak! On the way!"
— When Takeo is swarmed.


"Covering fire on its way for ya, Tak!"
— When Takeo is swarmed.


"We gotta go help out Takeo!"
— When Takeo is swarmed.


"Takeo's in trouble! Gotta help him!"
— When Takeo is swarmed.


"Nice work, Takeo! But, you missed some."
— When Takeo makes a crawler.


"We have a knee-biter comin' in!"
— When Takeo makes a crawler.


"Watch out for the crawler!"
— When Takeo makes a crawler.


"You see what you did there, Takeo!"
— When Takeo makes a crawler.


"Hey! Takeo! Some of it's still alive!"
— When Takeo makes a crawler.


"Wind 'em up and let 'em loose, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Unleash the little guy, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Use the monkey, Takeo! I like its little song!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Blow em' to hell, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Hey Takeo! Wind it up and see if Richtofen will chase it down!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Lucky shot!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot.


"Hehe, you must've been aiming at the other one."
— When Richtofen gets a headshot.


"Accidental discharge, Richtofen?"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot.


"Glad your luck hasn't run out, Richtofen."
— When Richtofen gets a headshot.


"I've made that shot before without a gun."
— When Richtofen gets a headshot.


"Richtofen's all surrounded! Let's leave him to his friends!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed.


"Hey, Richtofen! Stop dating and start shooting!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed.


"Yo, Richtofen. You find your MOTHER!?"
— When Richtofen is swarmed.


"Looks like you've got some fans there, Richtofen!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed.


"Richtofen's got zombies all over him! Must be that evil scent he puts out."
— When Richtofen is swarmed.


"Seriously, Richtofen, you gotta at least TRY to kill the thing!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"Thanks a ton, Doc. You just made a crawler!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"We got a stumpy comin' in, thanks to the Doctor!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"Not a lot of good can happen when the Doc is shootin'."
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"Stop playing, Richtofen! Kill it already!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"Quit trying to torture the zombies, Richtofen! You've done enough already!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler.


"Ah, poor little monkey. All alone in Richtofen's hands."
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Look like Richtofen has multiplied!"
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb.


"I don't know what's worse. Richtofen with a gun or with the stuffed monkey."
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Hey, Richtofen. Wind it up and hold it for a while. I wanna see what happens!"
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Richtofen, stop playing with your monkey, man!"
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Haha, and you thought I wouldn't find it."
— Upon entering the bathroom at first floor.


"No time for sugar, baby. I'm here to check the meter!"
— Upon entering the dressing room.


"Hey, check it out! I'm outside!"
— Upon gaining access to the alley.


"Alright, I always did want a spot on the big screen."
— After the power is turned on and then, entering the theater.


"Another easter egg. Ha! How do they do it."
— Upon entering the foyer.


"They're everywhere! Awesome."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Time to die! Uh, you guys. Not me!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Hey, did Richtofen send you all!?"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"They're all around me! That'll even the odds."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Never saw a zombie swarm I didn't like."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"You corner at Dempsey, you'll get dead real quick."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"It's gonna take everyone of you to take me down!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Woo! Bring it on!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Die, you blood-sucking slack-jawed maggot-bags!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Aw, come on! Where's my backup!?"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Ahh, just what I like! Multiple targets!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Lob the lead, freak-bags! You're all gonna die today!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Hey, I found all the zombies!"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Let's see, a thousand zombies, one Dempsey. Yeah, that's probably fair."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Is it just me or am I alone here? Hehe."
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Why is it always up to me!?"
— When swarmed by zombies.


"Looks like part of a meteor."
— After having the first piece of the meteor.


"Here's another one!"
— After found the second piece of the meteor.


"This has gotta be the last piece."
— After finding the last piece of the meteor.


"I found the hidden song. Awesome!"
— Upon activating the "115" song easter egg.


"Ahh, a tale of two Dempseys. Starts slow, but, has a happy ending."
— After examining his portrait.


"Whoa, looks like Nikolai's put on a few pounds. What's he been eatin'?"
— After examining Nikolai's portrait.


"Awwwww, our little bundle of badass."
— After examining Takeo's portrait.


"His portrait's bigger than anyone elses. Must be trying to compensate for somethin'."
— Upon examining Richtofen's portrait.


"Hey, look! It's nobody!"
— After examining the blacked-out portrait.


"The Waffle! Killing zombies made easy in one single step. Batteries included."
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box. (Said in a very fast, commercial-sounding voice.)


"Element 115. Concentrated to a single beam of pure badassery...wait...how the hell do I know that?"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box. Note reference to the brainwashing effect caused by Element 115 on Takeo, Nikolai, and Dempsey.


"The DG-2... one slick piece of machinery."
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Wonder Waffle...yeah. Thing 'o beauty."
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Hey zombies! You like Waffles?"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Welcome to the party meatsacks!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"They got ZERO chance against me and the Wonder Waffle!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"You see that? HOLY SHIT BALLS!"
— Killing zombie/s with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Time to fry freakmaggots!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"BZZZ! ZAP! Woohoo!"
— Killing zombie/s with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Gotta light the grill!"
— Upon receiving the M2 Flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"BURN!"
— Killing zombies with the M2 Flamethrower


"That smells a little like popcorn."
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower


"Woo! You want fries with that?!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower


"Mmm. That's some well done meat right there."
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower


"Burn in hell, you skull sucking maggot!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower


Dempsey's Quotes (Kino)

Dempsey's Quotes (Kino)


Nikolai BelinskiEdit

"Maybe someone should go turn on the power now."
— At the beginning.


"No power! Just like home."
— At the beginning.


"I think we need to do something about the power."
— At the beginning.


"Who didn't pay the electric bill?"
— At the beginning.


"We should go find the fuse box."
— At the beginning.


"Out of my way piz-da!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Move it! Coming through!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You got puss on my new shirt!..I have to dry clean now!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You capitalist pigdogs!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"It tried to take my vodka!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Die by the hand of Nikolai! Hey, dat rhyme, heh..."
— Upon getting a kill when "Insta-Kill" is on.


"Die now, son of bitch!"
— Upon getting a kill when Insta-Kill is on.


"Do svidaniya, bitches!"
— Upon getting a kill when Insta-Kill is on. ("Do svidaniya" meaning "goodbye" in Russian.)


"Euuuaaaaghhhhhh!!"
— Upon getting a kill when Insta-Kill is on.


"I'll drink to your death"
— Upon getting a kill when Insta-Kill is on.


"Now that's what I call a goulash!"
— Killing multiple zombies with an explosive weapon


"You fall like coddled bourgeois."
— When getting multiple kills


"I made a very big mess."
— When getting multiple kills


"No it's MY VODKA! MINE! MY OWN!"
— When getting multiple kills


"Death to you, demon-spawn!"
— When getting multiple kills


"I just killed a billion zombies! Why is no one helping?!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Good hellspawns! Die!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Like wheat before scythe."
— Upon multiple kills.


"Nikolai cannot die. Hey, that rhymes!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Hey guys, look what I did."
— Upon multiple kills.


"The Red Army cannot be overrun!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Ha! You cannot even beat a drunk Soviet!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"NEVER mess with a Soviet!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"No! No vodka for you!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"If that's all you got. Maybe, I'm not drinking enough."
— Upon multiple kills.


"STAY AWAY FROM MY VODKA! What? It's a classic!"
— After an explosive kill.


"This fucking gun is amazing!"
— Getting a kill with the Ray Gun


"That was satisfying."
— Getting a kill with the Ray Gun


"I've got more for you."
— Getting a kill with the Ray Gun


"No chance for you, hellpig!"
— Getting a kill with the Ray Gun


"No more drinks for you! You've been cut off. heh."
— Getting a kill with the Ray Gun


"They were here, now they're not. Such is life in the...ah, fuck it."
— After an explosive kill.


"Explosives make things so much easier."
— After an explosive kill.


"BOOM! You are dead!"
— After an explosive kill.


"Have a round on me! Get it? Because... never mind, fuck you."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"I can barely see, but that sounded like it hit his head!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Right between the glaza (eyes)!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Either I'm good or I'm drunk. I hit two zombies with one bullet!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Your misery has ended, comrade."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Die AGAIN, hellpig!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Never mess with a Russian when drinks are on the line!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Somehow, I have good aim!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Poor Russian lost his head."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"My aim is straight. My vision is blurry."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Don't slip in the slime!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"What's that smell? Maybe I sharted."
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"DIE slime thing, DIE! DIE!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"You got slime on my uniform!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"*sniffs* Ugh, that smells disgusting, like my fourth wife... She pretty though.. pretty and smelly, weird combo."
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Like the fist of Stalin... up your ass."
— Upon getting a kill with the Thundergun.


"Crushed under the might of the Red Army!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Thundergun.


"How do you like that, demons!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Thundergun.


"DIE, you filthy dogs!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Thundergun.


"Oh..They're splattered all over the place now."
— Upon getting a kill with the Thundergun.


"Nikolai cannot die! Hey, that rhymes!"
— After a knife kill.


"Die, demon hell-pigs!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"You left your arm behind!"
— After destroying a zombie's limb.


"He's half the zombie he used to be."
— After destroying a zombie's limb.


"Limbless creature, I still have no pity."
— After destroying a zombie's limb.


"He can't sip from his bottle anymore."
— After destroying a zombie's limb.


"I will put you out of your misery now."
— After destroying a zombie's limb.


"From Russia with great affection!"
— After killing a zombie, a reference to the movie From Russia with Love.


"Oh sure, you grovel, but you still cannot have any vodka!"
— Upon spawning a legless/footless zombie.


"Looks like I didn't get all of him."
— Upon spawning a legless/footless zombie.


"He is persistent, like begging peasant!"
— Upon spawning a legless/footless zombie.


"Hey! Look what you're doing to the floor!"
— Upon spawning a legless/footless zombie.


"He's crawling back to me, just like good woman. Heh."
— Upon spawning a legless/footless zombie.


"It pains me to kill you again, comrade."
— Upon getting a kill on a legless/footless zombie.


"That one isn't a problem anymore."
— Upon getting a kill on a legless/footless zombie.


"If only I had time to piss on you too."
— Upon getting a kill on a legless/footless zombie.


"Die, you filthy creature!"
— Upon getting a kill on a legless/footless zombie.


"Stand up and say that to my face!"
— Upon getting a kill on a legless/footless zombie.


"Screw all of you!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"I think the zombies hate you monkey!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"I can't believe that works."
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"I knew that monkey was good for something."
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"Good! That song was driving me nuts."
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb. A reference to a similar quote in Der Riese.


"OW! My shins!"
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"What was that? Oh, crawler!"
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"Stay off my boots, hellpig!"
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"Stop scratching me!"
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"Get off of me, swine."
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"Die, Satan's minions!"
— When getting attacked by a zombie.


"I like it rough, but not that rough!"
— When getting attacked by a zombie.


"You know how to say "owned" in Russian? OWNT!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"No, it's my vodka! MINE! MINE OWN!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"No touchie! ...I have issue."
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"You are dead now! But you were dead before! Ah, fuck you!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"You see what happens when you touch Nikolai?!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Let's play "Fetch the Grenade", demon spawn!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Come cyka, I have vodka for you."
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"They are trying to fetch our souls again!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"You don't want my soul, it probably tastes like vodka. Mmm... vodka."
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"I think there are dogs coming now."
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Die, helldog!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Woof. Woof. Die, demon-spawn!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Down, cyka!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound. (cyka Translates to Bitch in russian)


"No soul for you!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"*spits* Ugh...it got fur in my mouth"
— Killing a Hellhound


"I have made mess in trousers..."
— When downed.


"Maybe I have time for drink."
— When downed. A reference to a similar quote in Der Riese.


"Do not leave me to the maggots!"
— When downed. A reference to a similar quote in Der Riese.


"Oh, I feel stupid..."
— When downed. A reference to a similar quote in Der Riese.


"Come back! Nikolai can still fight!"
— When downed. A reference to a similar quote in Der Riese.


"Wha-what? I was only taking a nap!"
— After being revived.


"You see what happened to me? There were thousands!"
— After being revived.


"All right, all right, I'll get up all ready, sheesh..... *quietly* like mother."
— After being revived.


"What? Is breaktime over now?"
— After being revived.


"How do you say... "thank you" in Idiot?"
— After being revived.


"Getting low on ammunition!"
— When low on ammo.


"Running low on ammo! I'm drunk..."
— When low ammo.


"Greedy capitalist dogs! Give me ammo!"
— When low of ammo


"Why am I always needing more ammo?"
— When low of ammo.


"If I don't find ammo, I will have to kill them with my breath!"
— When low of ammo.


"It's that clicking again! Oh, ammo!"
— When out of ammo.


"Hey, where is all the ammo at?"
— When out of ammo.


"I'm out of ammo! Maybe I should just drink instead... piss on someone..."
— When out of ammo.


"When did I run out of ammo?"
— When out of ammo.


"Why is no one caring about my lack of ammo?"
— When out of ammo.


"Holding this up makes my arms so tired."
— After getting a sniper rifle or M14 from the Mystery Box.


"Hey... snipers may wear diapers, but we get all the ladies. eh? Hey hey."
— Upon buying an M14 off the wall.


"I can camp somewhere and not have to move so much. Good. I get tired."
— Upon buying an M14 off the wall.


"Alright, who wants to try and take me?"
— After buying any SMG off the wall.


"Eheheh. Come baby...we do the 59, eh? He he..."
— After buying any SMG from the wall.


"This is "nice and light"..."
— After buying any SMG off the wall.


"This will make demon-holes nicely!"
— After buying any SMG from the wall. (These SMG lines above are also said when getting a SMG from the Mystery Box.)


"A shotgun, now I just need a shot glass! He he!"
— After buying an Olympia off the wall.


"Please, I have no job!"
— When attempt to buy a weapon without requisite points.


"Such quality manufacturing. Must come from Motherland."
— When buying the Bowie Knife


"I will stab them in the back, like Stalin did me."
— When buying the Bowie Knife


"This weapon makes me happy."
— When buying the Bowie Knife


"I will cut them, like a filthy capitalist pig!"
— When buying the Bowie Knife


"What a sturdy piece of equipment!"
— When buying the Bowie Knife


"Just what the doctor ordered."
— Upon receiving a Max Ammo power-up.


"Why am I so heavy now?"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"This is proper socialist reform!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"It is happy hour!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"Vodka for everybody!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"Capitalism. If you can't beat them. Meh."
— Upon getting a Fire-Sale power-up


"If this were Russian, it would be free. Just big lines."
— Upon getting a Fire-Sale power-up


"Ugh, these lights are making me sick."
— Upon getting a Fire-Sale power-up


"What is happening? That music sucks. I need another drink."
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"A Fire-Sale. I hope they have vodka."
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Salute!"
— Upon getting the Nuke power-up


"Nikolai is coming for you!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"Taste communist aggression, filthy wormtrain!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"I drink to the nuclear bomb!"
— Upon getting the Nuke power-up


"Die, demon hellpigs!"
— Upon getting a Nuke power-up.


"Oh good, I don't have to do anything."
— Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.


"That will keep em' out for a while."
— Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.


"Did you guys hear that voice?"
— Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.


"Stay out, helldogs!"
— Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.


"Thank you, disembodied girl voice."
— Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.


"I think Dempsey is right. It is a bit fishy."
— Upon drinking Quick Revive.


"Reach for vodka tooooniiiiggghhht..."
— Upon drinking Juggernog. (Said in song of "Juggernog" tune.)


"Why can I see so clearly now?"
— Upon drinking Speed Cola.


"My tap is now doubled, but not my vodka!"
— When Double Tap Root Beer is bought.


"Ugh, this is like standing in grocery line!"
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"This better be good. It cost enough!"
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"Hurry hurry hurry hurry hurry! Come on!"
— Putting a gun in the Pack-A-Punch machine


"Waiting is good! I can have more drink!"
— Putting a gun in the Pack-A-Punch machine


"*snores* Eh, fuck you."
— Putting a gun in the Pack-A-Punch machine


"This Soviet is ready to fight now!"
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"I will hold the demon-spawn at bay with this!"
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"HK Goodness!"
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"Die demon-spawn!"
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"What I wouldn't give for two of these, heh."
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"May you rest in pieces, zombies!"
— After receiving a H115 Oscillator.


"Don't worry guys! Nikolai is coming for you!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Oh, I like, it's pretty!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Such power, so smooth! And this upgraded weapon is nice too..."
— Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.


"Heh, a weapon suitable for a Soviet."
— Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.


"Da-BOOM!"
— Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.


"Exactly what I need!"
— Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.


"Oh I like! It's pretty!"
— Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.


"Got ninety-nine problems, but a gun ain't one, da!"
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box. (Also said when buying an M16) and a reference to "99 Problems", a song by Jay-Z.


"Beats a hammer and sickle every time."
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box. (Also said when buying an M16. Actually in all the lines below.)


"Ohhh, look it how shiny she is."
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box.


"A toast to a brilliant weapon."
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box.


"This should help me protect my vodka."
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box.


"Hello zombies, I am coming for you!"
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box.


"More bullets, more drinks. This is not so bad."
— After getting an Assault Rifle from Mystery Box.


"Magnificent!"
— After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.


"I love this FN gun! Get it? Cause it's a FN? like... fuck!"
— After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.


"I wish they had more vodka to go with falafel."
— After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.


"Aw! I got the FN FAIL! Heh Heh. Get it?"
— After getting the FN FAL from the Mystery Box


"This FN FAL is good weapon, no?"
— After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.


"I like this."
— After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.


"They stand no chance against this Soviet."
— After getting a shotgun from the Mystery Box (also said after buying an Olympia or a Stakeout)


"Time to die now, zombies!"
— After getting a shotgun from the Mystery Box


"Nikolai will show them the way back to hell now!"
— After getting a shotgun from the Mystery Box


"A weapon like this will end them in a hurry!"
— After getting a shotgun from the Mystery Box


"12 gauge fury!"
— After getting a shotgun from the Mystery Box


"Hello beautiful, I will 'cock' you gently."
— After getting a sniper rifle from Mystery Box. (Also said when buying an M14 off the wall.)


"Now, I can keep my pants from getting bloodier. Hehey."
— After getting a sniper rifle from Mystery Box.


"A sniper rifle makes for much cleaner killing."
— After getting a sniper rifle from Mystery Box.


"I never met an MG I didn't like"
— Upon getting an SMG from the Mystery Box. (Also said when buying an SMG from the Mystery Box.)


"Ugh... This is terrible weapon."
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Why? Why do you treat me like this?"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Come box, share with me your treasures, not your junk!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Ugh, Useless."
— After Getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box


"Ugh, I have better luck when I am drunk!"
— After getting a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box


"Ah, two guns are better than one! And one is better than, uh... what?"
— After getting Dual CZ75s from the Mystery Box.


"I will be able to take them out gangsta' style now!"
— After getting Dual CZ75s from the Mystery Box.


"Either I'm drunk, or I'm holding two guns!"
— Said after getting Dual CZ75s from the Mystery Box.


"How am I supposed to hold my vodka if I have to carry both of these?"
— Said after getting Dual CZ75s from the Mystery Box.


"This makes Nikolai very happy, like after first date! ...I bring home flower!"
— After getting a China Lake, M72 LAW, or Crossbow from Mystery Box.


"I will make Stalin proud!"
— After getting a China Lake, M72 LAW, or Crossbow from Mystery Box.


"This looks like fun!"
— After getting a China Lake, M72 LAW, or Crossbow from Mystery Box.


"Must've drank so much, I went to the future! Heh."
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"It's like finding extra vodka in your pocket."
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"Such power... Such pride! It must be Russian made!"
— Upon receiving the Thundergun


"Hello Ray. Would you like to taste my vodka?"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"This must come from outer space, no?"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box


"Oooo, It's the Ray Gun! Hehehehe."
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box


"First it takes my money, then it disappears... just like my fourth wife!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"This little girl and her games. It's a sign of bad parenting."
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Does anyone else hear that or is it just me?"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Either I'm drunk or that box is flying around?"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Why hasn't somebody tried nailing this down?!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Oh well, maybe I'll just sit here and nap."
— When trying to use Mystery Box without requisite points.


"Fuck you, monkey!"
— After receiving a Monkey Bomb.


"No, Monkey, you may not have any vodka."
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box.


"Aiiiii...I think it's taunting me. I don't like monkey. Remind me of circus in Bagrationovsk."
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box.("Bagrationovsk" is a city in Russia.)


"I don't like it's beady little eyes."
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box.


"Why do play this annoying song, monkey?!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box.


"This must be vodka-powered."
— After obtaining Thundergun from the Mystery Box.


"Well, this looks new."
— After obtaining Thundergun from the Mystery Box.


"Such pride, such power. Must be Russian made."
— After obtaining Thundergun from the Mystery Box.


"Does this come with a cupholder?"
— After obtaining Thundergun from the Mystery Box.


"I really like these gadgets."
— After obtaining Thundergun from the Mystery Box.


"Oorah, Dempsey!"
— When Dempsey gets a headshot

"That was a shot deserving a toast."
— When Dempsey gets a headshot

"Good shooting, Tank. Next wife, I call you."
— When Dempsey gets a headshot

"Maybe,I give you a small taste of vodka someday. Someday."
— When Dempsey gets a headshot

"I admire your aim Tank, but not your sobriety."
— When Dempsey gets multiple headshots.

"Back, hellpigs!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed

"On my way, Dempsey, but you owe me some vodka in return!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed

"Why are you not sharing, you fucking capitalist?!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed

"Dempsey is surrounded!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed

"Dempsey, maybe try giving 'em something and then, they go away!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed

"Nice shot Dempsey! But you missed a little bit."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler

"Watch for the crawler, Dempsey!"
— When Dempsey makes a crawler

"There is a crawler on the loose!"
— When Dempsey makes a crawler

"Dempsey, you made a crawler."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler

"He's not altogether dead yet, Dempsey."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler

"Dempsey, watch out for that evil monkey! He freak me out."
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb

"Watch out, Dempsey. It bites!"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb

"Dempsey and monkey sitting in a tree. K-I-L-L-I-N-G. I spelled it right, right?"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.

"Set him loose, so it dies!"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.

"I like your monkey, Dempsey. But, not that little monster."
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.

"So what, Takeo?"
— When Takeo gets a headshot

"Luck favors the weak."
— When Takeo gets a headshot

"You were 3 feet away. Big deal."
— When Takeo gets a headshot

"My little sister shoots better than you, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets a headshot

"Let's throw a parade for our mighty but tiny warrior."
— When Takeo gets a headshot. Replaces "Bushido" with "but tiny."

"I'll come to your rescue, but only because you owe me from last time!"
— When Takeo is swarmed

"Takeo, you've made friends."
— When Takeo is swarmed

"Did they steal your sense of humor, Takeo?"
— When Takeo is swarmed

"Oh, look! Our Mighty Bushido Warrior is surrounded again! *high pitched* Hehyiiii!"
— Upon seeing Takeo chased by a swarm of Zombies. (The "hehyi" is said, taunting Takeo's Japanese sayings.)

"They must be attracted to your "honor!""
— Upon seeing Takeo chased by a swarm of Zombies

"Try killing it next time, Takeo!"
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"You never finish anything."
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"There's is more to kill still."
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"We have a crawler, Thanks to Takeo."
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"Thank you for sharing your misery, Takeo."
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"Not so honorable, are you, Takeo."
— When Takeo makes a crawler

"Maybe the evil monkey will eat YOU, Takeo!"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb

"I hate you both."
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb

"The Mighty Warrior and his little doll."
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb

"Look out, Takeo. The monkey might wind YOU up! *laughs*"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb

"heh. You guys make perfect couple. You are both ugly. Love to see your kids. *chuckles*"
— When Takeo gets the Monkey Bomb

"What! I did something?"
— Upon getting a Xbox 360 achievement/Playstation 3 Trophy.


"The film must've been shit, this place is full of stiffs!"
— Upon turning on the power.


"Uh, uh-oh. That sounds like trouble."
— When the Crawler Zombies spawn/turning on the power.


"Oh so. What's all that noise? It's making my headache worse!"
— When the Crawler Zombies spawn/turning on the power.


"Do you guys hear all that racket?"
— When the Crawler Zombies spawn/turning on the power.


"Now, it's going to happen."
— When the Crawler Zombies spawn/turning on the power.


"Perfect. More things to chase me around."
— When the Crawler Zombies spawn/turning on the power.


"Perfect, I shall piss in style here!"
— Upon entering the bathroom in first floor.


"Another dark alley, I know this well."
— Upon gaining access to the alley.


"Dempsey, I think you left your blush!"
— Upon gaining access to the dressing room.


"This place looks like my first apartment. Just less blood."
— Upon gaining access to the foyer.


"What?! That stripper must have stolen my money!"
— Upon trying to buy something with insufficient points.


"Oh I found a rock, great."
— After finding the first piece of the meteor.


"I found another rock... but no vodka!"
— After finding the second piece of the meteor.


"Here's the last piece. What do I win?"
— After finding the third/last piece of the meteor.


"Hey Hey, I found something neat!"
— When he activates the musical easter egg


"Well, they do say the screen puts on ten pounds."
— After examining his portrait.


"Hey Dempsey! I think they got your bad side!"
— After examining Dempsey's portrait.


"I hate you, Takeo."
— After examining Takeo's portrait.


"Richtofen looks a little younger in this painting."
— After examining Richtofen's portrait.


"Hey! Someone stole the image from this picture!"
— After examining the blacked-out portrait.


"Richtofen, your children are becoming annoying!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of zombies.


"Why do they insist on picking on me?!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"You capitalist hellpigs, DIE!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Meet the fury of the Red Army!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"You didn't bring enough hellpigs to take on a Soviet!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"I am surrounded by hellpigs!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"I think they're all trying to steal my vodka!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Either I'm surrounded or I'm seeing double!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Come quickly! I'm surrounded!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Bad hellpigs, BAD!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Come, let's dance to your butchka!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"I think I'm alone now. There doesn't seem to be anyone around.They're all around me now!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies. A reference to "I Think We're Alone Now", by multiple artists.


"You Bolshevik dogs!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"*sniffs* Alright, Which one of you crap your pants."
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"I gotta move or they'll take me down!"
— Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.


"Anyone else smell bacon?"
— Upon killing a zombie with the M2 Flamethrower


"You DIE!"
— Upon killing a zombie with a flamethrower


"You are on fire, hellpig!"
— Upon killing a zombie with a flamethrower


"All this fire is making me sweat. Sweat vodka!"
— Upon killing a zombie with a flamethrower


"Taste the flames of hell!"
— Upon killing a zombie with a flamethrower


"Ey! It's a flamethrower!"
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Let's see if I can light my breath on fire. No,no,no,no! Come! Come look! This is funny!"
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Anyone need a light?"
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Da. Same weapon I used to kill my- oh- no, that was something else. I used iron."
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Hey Dempsey, I found a flamethrower. Jealous?"
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Hoho. Is it just me or is it getting hot in here. *chuckles*"
— Receiving a flamethrower from the Mystery Box


"Oh great! It's the Wonderfulwaffle!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Hellpigs! I am coming!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Now, this gun makes Nikolai a very happy cossack!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"This has more power than Moscow Electric Company!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"This ALMOST as strong as the best Russian vodka."
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"I have more for you!"
— Upon killing a zombie with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Taste the power of the Red Menace!"
— Upon killing a zombie with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Electrocution! Just like the gulag! What fun. Good times."
— Upon killing a zombie with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Ha! You die like the dogs that you are."
— Upon killing a zombie with the Wunderwaffe DG-2


"Heh, I think I saw his bone for a split-second."
— Upon killing a zombie with the Wunderwaffe DG-2

Takeo MasakiEdit

"We need to bring light to this dark place."
— At the beginning.


"This place is dark. We need to find the light!"
— At the beginning.


"There seems to be no power!"
— At the beginning.


"There is no power now! Perhaps there never was."
— At the beginning.


"We should go find the power box."
— At the beginning.


"Your teeth will not cut into my flesh!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Keep your hands to yourself, monster!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You will not feel the flesh of the honorable!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Always counter your enemy's movements!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Your evil cannot infect the honorable!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Daah, I'm soaked with your blood!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"My personal space must be preserved!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You will never touch me, hell-beast!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Shi-Ne!"
— Upon getting a knife kill. "Shi-Ne" means "die" in Japanese.


"My honor is bigger than yours!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Now you die!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Die, Monster!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"I send you to your ancestors!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"You die with no honor!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Hyah!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Die, foul creatures!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"I will not stop until you are all destroyed!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Return to darkness!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Continuance is strength, so I shall continue!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"When I am finished, none shall remain!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"You bring me great honor!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"There is no victory, only death!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"You cannot survive this!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Die, cursed beasts!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Feel the fist of the emperor!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"Amazing!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"With the force of one thousand wombats, YOU DIE!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"You explode with honour!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"You all kneel before the emperor!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"Takeo one, Zombie zero!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"That is one for Takeo, zero for zombie!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Hmm. Impressive."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Their head vanishes, then death."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"No supper for you!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"That is perfect training!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"I cannot allow you to stare at me!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Now your head is a threat to no one!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"You cannot harm us without a mouth!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"The beast never knew what hit him!"
— Upon getting a headshot.
"Eat my vengeance!"
— Upon killing a crawler.


"You are purified!"
— Upon killing a crawler.


"I take great pleasure in ending you!"
— Upon killing a crawler.


"There is no tomorrow for you!"
— Upon killing a crawler.


"I have taken care of the crawler!"
— Upon killing a crawler.


"Ugh, that thing could not ever have been human!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Argh! Smells like rotten sushi!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"You have been purified!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"I will rid the Earth of this plague!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Back to nothing with you!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


""(Japanese Verbs)""
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"By the might of a thousand thunder claps!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"You have been vanquished!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Die a thousand deaths!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"You will be destroyed!"
— Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Pew pew, pew pew, hahahahaha!"
— Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.


"Your soul will not survive this!"
— Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.


"You are eviscerated!"
— Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.


"Such power!"
— Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.


"You have been deemed unworthy!"
— Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.


"The path of the unholy is always trumped by the pure!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Taste the honor!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Ahh, as fierce as he is cute!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"With honor you die, monkey."
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Those stupid beasts!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Monkey Bomb.


"Ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"My honour is bigger than yours!"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"It is rotting from the inside!"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"No more meat for you!"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"Give him a hand! (laughs)"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"Its evil persists!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"That creature is possessed!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"Die, evil beast!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"Eat death, beast!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"You don't have enough honor to die!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"You kill me? No! I kill you!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Not on this day, tormented soul!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"You had an unhappy ending! Ha ha ha!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Your strike was weak!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"You lack focus!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Crawler!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Get Back!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Look out for the short zombie!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Watch your feet!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"Stay off my uniform!"
— Upon being hit by a legless/footless zombie.


"I fear no dog!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"We have truly angered hell!"
— At the begginning of a Hellhound round.


"Hell has sent its hounds!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"These Hell-beasts must be destroyed!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"You may not take me!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Die, demon-spawn!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Die, dog!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"You cannot take that which is not yours!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"You are vanquished!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"I require assistance!"
— When downed.


"Is this how it ends?"
— When downed.


"This is not how I wish to die!"
— When downed.


"This is without reason!"
— When downed.


"This cannot be!"
— When downed.


"I have fallen into darkness!"
— When downed.


"Your karma has approved"
— After being revived.


"You have much honor..."
— After being revived.


"Nana korobi, ya oki."
— After being revived. A Japanese proverb meaning "fall seven times, stand up eight."


"Even monkeys fall from trees!"
— After being downed.


"Meditation time over!"
— After being revived.


"My weapon is low on honour."
— When low on ammo.


"I will soon need ammunition."
— When low on ammo.


"This weapon will be useless without bullets!"
— When low on ammo.


"I should go look for more ammunition."
— When low on ammo.


"Where is my ammunition?"
— When low on ammo.


"Need more ammunition!"
— When low ammo


"A true warrior needs no weapon!"
— When out of ammo.


"I have no ammo. I have no honor."
— When out of ammo.


"Vengeance waits for no ammunition!"
— When out of ammo.


"I will use my bare hands!"
— When out of ammo.


"I am still better off with the Arisaka."
— When out of ammo.


"I will fire honor at them mightily!"
— After buying an SMG off the wall.


"I will show them the path!"
— After buying an SMG off the wall.


"I need more honor!"
— When trying to buy a weapon without requisite points.


"This weapon is lighter than a feather, but more than twice as deadly."
— After buying an SMG off of the wall.


"One by one, I shall curse them from afar!"
— After buying the M14 off of the wall.


"It's almost a katana."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Shiny!"
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"An honorable weapon."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Sometimes, I like to keep them close."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"I will stab with perfection!"
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Oh... blessings come from above!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up


"The tide tips in our favour!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"The spirits come to aid us!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"Double the honor!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"Now we can continue the fight!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"The path of the virtuous gives great gifts!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"The unholy shall kneel before the might of the honorable!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"I am possessed by the power of the EMPEROR!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"You will feel the power in my veins!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"That will hold them up for a while."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"This gives us time to prime."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"The stake that sticks out gets hammered down!"
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"Quick, kill as many as you can!"
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up


"That will keep them out for a thousand year- er, uh, well, a few seconds."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"Let the light of a thousand suns purify your souls!"
— Upon getting a Nuke power-up.


"Destruction rains on the unholy!"
— Upon getting a Nuke power-up.


"...Nice timing!"
— Upon getting a Nuke power-up.


"What is a fire sale?"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"We will take this a sign!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"If we move quickly, we will be rewarded!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"There is little time to grab a deal, ha ha!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"To the box!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Hmm, a drink that requires a... mature palette."
— Upon drinking Quick Revive.


"Speed Cola speeds up your life!"
— Upon drinking Speed Cola, said in a quite fast voice.


"I am fast shooting Eastern cowboy!"
— Upon drinking Double Tap Root Beer.


"Ahhh. This water is a pure delight!"
— Upon drinking Juggernog.


"Consequences will never be the same!"
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"A true warrior forges his own bread!"
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"Patience is a virtue of the honorable!"
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"May the weapon be blessed... by the ancestor!"
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"I will honor this machine, by slaying many...."
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"This will make a weapon that will honor my ancestors."
— After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"A weapon is an extension of ones ownself."
— After taking a newly upgraded weapon out of the Pack-a-Punch.


"Much better"
— Receiving a weapon from the Pack a Punch Machine


"Now with more honor!"
— Receiving a weapon from the Pack a Punch Machine


"Now this is what I'm talking about!"
— Receiving a weapon from the Pack a Punch Machine


"I cannot be defeated!...Probably..."
— After getting an AUG from Mystery Box.


"I will turn them into red mist!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"Now they die!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"The damned will be destroyed!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"Their annihilation would please the emperor!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"This cursed plague ends here!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"Ahh... a weapon fit for a warror!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"They will fall before me!"
— After getting an LMG from Mystery Box.


"This is lighter than a feather, but more than twice as deadly!"
— After getting an SMG from Mystery Box.


"Ahhh... The bullets will rain upon the demon spawn!"
— After getting an SMG from Mystery Box.


"With this SMG, I bring death!"
— After getting an SMG from Mystery Box.


"I will fire honor at them mightily!"
— After getting an SMG from Mystery Box.


"I will fire honor at them mightily!"
— After getting an SMG from Mystery Box.


"Hmm... A fine weapon."
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box.


"They will not expect my ambush!"
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box. A reference to how Japanese soldiers ambushed soldiers in WWII.


"They will die without honor!"
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box.


"One by one, I will curse them from afar!"
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box.


"Ahh... A useful weapon!"
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box.


"I will steal what honor they have left!"
— After getting a Sniper Rifle from Mystery Box.


"This does not suit a warrior!"
— After getting a CZ75 or a Python from Mystery Box.


"A worthless weapon, from an honor-less box!"
— After getting a CZ75 or a Python from Mystery Box.


"I see the box still dispenses dishonor!"
— After getting a CZ75 or a Python from Mystery Box.


"Mmm. If only this box had honor!"
— After getting a CZ75 or a Python from Mystery Box.


"This is unacceptable!"
— After getting a CZ75 or a Python from Mystery Box.


"Double the honor!"
— After getting dual CZ75's from Mystery Box.


"Ahh, 2 guns is a good thing, for me!"
— After getting dual CZ75's from Mystery Box.


"I have more firepower!"
— After getting dual CZ75's from Mystery Box.


"Their disease will be forgotten!"
— After getting dual CZ75's from Mystery Box.


"I will bring the wrath of the emperor down upon them!"
— After getting dual CZ75's from Mystery Box.


"I will blast them apart!"
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"They will feel my anger with every destroyed limb!"
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"They will be zen..."
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"I shatter their souls!"
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"Now these beasts will be destroyed!"
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"I will end their suffering!"
— After getting a shotgun from Mystery Box.


"This gun fires pure honor!"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"The weapon that those who call me "ancestor" will employ!"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"Now I will send them back into darkness!"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"They will not know what hit them!"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"I will purify them!"
— After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.


"I have acquired the Thundergun!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"A gift from the emperor!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"Nature's fury, packed into a tube!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"I will unleash this great power!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"The skies will shake with my power!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"*chuckling* The Emperor would be amused!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"*chuckling*, I have found a toy!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"The monkey of honor!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"This monkey holds the cure to their disease!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"This will not fit in my scabbard!"
— After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.


"Honour... In spades!"
— After getting a China Lake or M72 LAW from Mystery Box.


"With this, I will purge this place!"
— After getting a China Lake or M72 LAW from Mystery Box.


"I will rain fire on the dishonorable!"
— After getting a China Lake or M72 LAW from Mystery Box.


"This teddy bear fuels my nightmares!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"The box is no longer here! Maybe never was..."
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"This box is cursed!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Who is responsible for this?"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"The box leaves us powerless!"
— After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.


"Your aim has pleased the Emperor!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot


"That was good shooting, doctor!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot


"Oh! They stand no chance against you!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot


"Oh! Amazing shot!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot


"You shoot like Samurai!"
— When Richtofen gets a headshot


"Richtofen is surrounded!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed


"We're coming to help, Richtofen!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed


"The doctor could use some assistance!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed


"On our way, doctor!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed


"Coming, Richtofen!"
— When Richtofen is swarmed


"Saving some for later?"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler


"I see you kept a bit of it alive."
— When Richtofen makes a crawler


"I think you made a crawler."
— When Richtofen makes a crawler


"Some of it still lives!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler


"Crawler, on its way!"
— When Richtofen makes a crawler


"Did you make that too, doctor?"
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb


"You are honered by the presence of the monkey."
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb


"You have been blessed by the Emperor."
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb


"Richtofen found the monkey."
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb


"Hurry up and use it!"
— When Richtofen gets the Monkey Bomb


"You have lucky number, Russian pig!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot


"That was not your shot, but your breath!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot


"The sight of you made its head explode!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot


"If you shoot 1000 bullets, you hit maybe one time!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot


"They fall before your ugliness!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot


"Poor Russian."
— When Nikolai is swarmed


"I'll be there someday, Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai is swarmed


"If you would shoot instead of taking shots, maybe that not happen!"
— When Nikolai is swarmed


"Just breathe on them!"
— When Nikolai is swarmed


"Oh! I thought you were one of them!"
— When Nikolai is swarmed


"Of course you didn't kill it all!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"(Mockingly) Oh, he must be attracted to you!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"They want to kill you, Nikolai...maybe can't blame them!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"Maybe they find you irritating."
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"Looks like you missed a bit."
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"Nothing like making friends, Nikolai, eh?"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler


"Maybe it will wind YOU up, Russian!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb


"The monkey is better at killing zombies than you!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb


"Look out, Nikolai! It's watching you!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb


"Its loud cymbals give you a headache, huh?"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb


"I bet that monkey hates you."
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb


"I require more funds!"
— When attempting to buy something on the wall without the required points.


"I need more honor!"
— When attempting to buy something on the wall without the required points.


"I am not yet ready for the way of the box."
— When attempting to buy a gun from the Mystery Box on the wall without the required points.


"Virtuous folds in the fire of adversity!"
— When being swarmed.


"I see them on all sides!"
— When being swarmed.


"The disease surround me!"
— When being swarmed.


"I must fight through the scourge!"
— When being swarmed.


"It takes discipline to be surrounded by your foes!"
— When being swarmed.


"You will all die again!"
— When being swarmed.


"You will meet your doom!"
— When being swarmed.


"I shall free your souls from your disease!"
— When being swarmed.


"You will be purified by honor!"
— When being swarmed.


"Your path leads to your death!"
— When being swarmed.


"You will meet the rage of Takeo!"
— When being swarmed.


"Hey guys! I am surrounded!"
— When being swarmed.


"I am surrounded by all that is unholy!"
— When being swarmed.


"Your disease ends here!"
— When being swarmed.


"The honorable cannot be tainted!"
— When being swarmed.


"Oh!... Sounds like a big monster is attacking the building."
— After turning on the electricity. A reference to the Japanese film, "Godzilla".


"The disease is spreading..."
— Upon turning the electricity on.


"Somehow, they are becoming more foul!"
— Upon turning the electricity on.


"Evil only begats more evil!"
— Upon turning the electricity on.


"Huh? What new evil is afoot?"
— Upon turning the electricity on.


"I found a piece of the meteor!"
— After found the first piece of the meteor.


"I found another rock! Maybe they stole this from Japan!"
— Finding the second piece of the meteor. A reference to the meteor at Shi No Numa.
"I found the last piece!"
— Finding the last piece of the meteor.


"I have found a grand secret!"
— Upon activating the "115" song easter egg.


"This is a picture of a great warrior!"
— After examining his portrait.


"A picture of The ugly American! Eugh!"
— After examining Dempsey's portrait.


"He is so drunk, I can smell his breath through this portrait!"
— After examining Nikolai's portrait.


"Perhaps what once was, is no more, but shall be again!"
— When examining the blacked out portrait.


"Honor to the doctor!"
— After examining Richtofen's portrait.


"Oh... I am honored."
— When earning an achievement.


"This will make for a fun time!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"I will SHOCK them into submission!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"I finally get the turn...with the Wunderwaffe."
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"BEHOLD! The Electric Katana!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"It is on now freakbags!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box (quoting Dempsey)


"The dragon's breathe will end their suffering!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"I will burn them off the face of the Earth!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"They will succumb to the brightness of my honor!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"Now they will become as ash!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"This disease will be burned away forever!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"They will be cured!"
— Receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"I burn away your sins!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"Darkness becomes light!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"That stings like wasabi!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower. Wasabi is a plant known for spiciness.


"Zombie Shabu-Shabu!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower. Shabu-Shabu is a Japanese soup.


"The rising sun burns you away!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


Edward RichtofenEdit

"Oh joy! No power!"
— At the beginning.


"*impatiently* Ja, ja, the power needs to be turned on."
— At the beginning. "Ja" is German for "yes".


"I cannot torture my minions without power... Dempsey, you go turn it on."
— At the beginning.


"Power power power power! It's always the first priority!"
— At the beginning. A reference to a similiar quote in Der Riese.


"There is no power, how suspicious... or obvious!"
— At the beginning.


"Stay away from me!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"You shan't touch the doctor!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"No my dear, I touch YOU!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"I like the way the bloodiness feels against my skin..."
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"I feel the blood in my eyes!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Ugh, I think you had an infection."
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"NEIN! TOO CLOSE!"
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"No touching the doctor!... Unless he asks."
— Upon getting a kill in a really close range.


"Die, my pretty! Die!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"I'll swallow your heart!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"THE BLOOD! THE BEAUTIFUL BLOOD!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"No more Doctor Nice Guy!"
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Ahh, it smells so wunderbar!"
— Upon getting a knife kill. "Wunderbar" translates to "wonderful".


"Their screams are so... erotic... ja."
— Upon getting a knife kill.


"Live up to your death!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"OH, THE LOVELY BLOOD!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Let me smell the delicate flesh, ja..."
— Upon multiple kills.


"Yes... ja, JA, DIE!!!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"The anguished cries of the damned make such music!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"I am so pleased! NOW DIE!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"I need more screams!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Don't be afraid of death. Be afraid of The Doctor!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"I take your pain! I put my straw in it! *slurping noise* And I drink it up!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Oh it hurts, doesn't it?... GOOD!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Ahh, you must be punished! You're dirty, DIRTY!"
— Upon multiple kills.


"Filthy schweinehund!"
— Upon multiple kills. Schweinehund translates to "pig-dog" in German.


"Oh, the showers of the damned!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"*singing* Fountains of sorrow..."
— Upon an explosive kill.


"Yes! Yes, explode!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"Tiny little organ parts for everybody!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"He's exploded!"
— Upon an explosive kill.


"DIE, SCHWEINE!"
— Upon an explosive kill. Schweine translates to pig.


"Bahaha, watch the little pieces of bone fly from its neck!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Awww, I cannot hear their screams if they no longer have mouths..."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Poof! You have no more head. Hahaha!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"See the power of Doctor Richtofen!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"Haha, ja, I want you to head for me!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"I want to get closer to embrace their pain!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"*laughter* His head shattered! *laughter*"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"You have paid the price for your insolence."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"POP goes the weasel!"
— Upon getting a headshot.


"OOH, it just went splat!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Squishy squishy, little bug."
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Now there is pus everywhere."
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"The Doctor says... DIE!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Taste my medicine, squishy beast!"
— Upon killing a Nova Crawler.


"Feel the power of Doctor Richtofen!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"The force of nature at my fingertips!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"Ja, bow before the almighty Doctor!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"They were all flattened like PANCAKES!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"I said take your medicine!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.


"AND... he is no longer with us."
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Where did he go? I don't know, do you?"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"He's become random bits of joy."
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Transmuted into nothing!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Do you like my glowing green balls?!"
— Upon getting a kill with a Ray Gun.


"Keep your head down next time! Haha, oh, there won't be a next time."
— Upon getting a headshot.


"You have all been fooled! Just like Peter! *laughter*"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"Oh, the excitement and joy of their sorrows!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"(singing) I don't think they saw that coming!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"You must have heard the voices that time!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"BOOM! You are all dead now!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Monkey Bomb.


"I could probably use that."
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"That's so... humerus. (laughs)"
— Upon shooting a limb off. A pun on humerus and humorous.


"No, no, you're not supposed to fall apart like that."
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"He cannot fight now. He's been... disarmed. (laughs)"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"That must be so beautifully painful!"
— Upon shooting a limb off.


"Look at what I have created!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"IT'S STILL ALIVE!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"OH JOY! I made und stumpy!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"Look at it, crawling to me!"
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"It has no legs, but still moves. Interesting."
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"Pity. He had such will to live."
— Upon killing a legless zombie.


"He cannot get up again, ha-ha."
— Upon killing a legless zombie.


"The life has been drained from that one."
— Upon killing a legless zombie.


"Ohhh, his torture was so beautiful!"
— Upon killing a legless zombie.


"Perhaps I can save his appendix."
— Upon killing a legless zombie.


"I can smell my own blood! FEAR ME!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"How DARE you touch the doctor?"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"LEAVE ME BE!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Schweinehund! Die!"
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him, "Schweinehund" translates literally to "pig-dog", but means the equivalent of "bastard" in German.


"Did you feel it? Oh, I hope you did."
— Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.


"Get off my legs, minion!"
— When getting attacked by a crawler.


"DIE!"
— When attacked by a crawler.


"It's tearing my shins! Delicious!"
— When attacked by a crawler.


"Stay below me, hundewurst!"
— When attacked by a crawler. "Hundewurst" translates to "sausage-dog".


"I'll kill you for your insolence!"
— When attacked by a crawler.


"Aww, the poor puppies!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"NEIN! NOT THE PUPPIES!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round. "Nein" is German for "No".


"Mommy said not to hurt animals any more!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"My poor little accidents... STAY AWAY!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Aww, poor little doggies!"
— At the beginning of a Hellhound round.


"Have no fear, the Doctor is present."
— Upon making a legless zombie.


"Aah, I don't like it when they lick me!"
— After killing a hellhound.


"Take them back, Samantha!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"Back, hellions! Die!"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"What have you done to the POOR PUPPIES?"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"How can they be so mean?"
— Upon killing a Hellhound.


"IT TICKLES! IT TICKLES! I KNOW IT, IT TICKLES!"
— When downed.


"IT CANNOT BE! I AM DOWN!"
— When downed.


"No, no. I am not ready for hell, I don't even have my good shoes!"
— When downed. A reference to a similiar quote in Der Riese.


"Death calls my name!"
— When downed.


"Help me! They are displeased!"
— When downed.


"I feel my life slipping away!"
— When downed.


"I'll get you something nice when this is over."
— After being revived.


"I am ALIVE!!!"
— After being revived.


"Did the voices tell you to save me?"
— After being revived.


"Ja, danke! (Yes, thanks!)"
— After being revived. This is the only quote Rictofen speaks entirely in German.


"They've all gone mad! We must help them."
— After being revived.


"Low on ammo!"
— When low on ammo.


"How could I be running out of ammo?!"
— When low on ammo.


"I need to find more of my little friends!"
— When low on ammo.


"I can't cherish their agony if I run out of ammo completely!"
— When low on ammo.


"I only have a few rounds left!"
— When low on ammo.


"Without bullets I will have to resort to... *gasp* STABBING!"
— When out of ammo.


"I need to find some ammunition... *wailing*"
— When out of ammo.


"No ammo is NO FUN!"
— When out of ammo.


"I have no ammunition."
— When out of ammo.


"No rounds, no wounds, NO JOY!"
— When out of ammo.


"Yes, now their kidneys will be all MINE! But none for you, Dempsey!"
— After buying a M14 off the wall.


"What? The voices are louder!"
— Upon buying a MP5K off the wall.


"Oh, this is just so heavy!"
— Buying M14 off the wall


"An autopsy is more easily performed with a shotgun."
— Upon buying a Stakeout or Olympia off the wall.


"Yes, my children, I am coming!"
— Upon buying an Olympia off the wall.


"The MP40! Wunderbar!"
— When buying a MP40 off the wall. "Wunderbar" is "wonderful" in German.


"Of course they still have the BEST WEAPON EVER MADE HERE!"
— When buying the MP40 off the wall.


"The Doctor is well armed!"
— When buying the MP40 off the wall.


"Look at the sheen on this weapon... striking."
— When buying the MP40 off the wall.


"What could be better than the MP40?"
— When buying the MP40 off the wall.


"Ah! The most precise invention!"
— When buying the MP40 off the wall.


"So sharp... so long!"
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Zombies! It's time for your disembowelment!"
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Oh look, I can see myself in it."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"Finally, a tool worthy of my hand."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife.


"I don't know who Jim Bowie was, but he must have been big and long... and sharp."
— Upon buying the Bowie Knife. Jim Bowie popularized the use of the Bowie Knife.


"A gift from Sam? But why?!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"More time to play with my pretty ones!"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"Ammo to the max, ja?"
— Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.


"MORE SCORE!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"I am paid for pain!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"I get paid double for my effort!"
— Upon getting a Double Points power-up.


"This must be the work of the Masons."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up; A reference to Freemason.


"STAY AWAY!"
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"That will keep my patients at bay."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"Are you... bored? *laughter*"
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up. A pun on the homophones "board" and "bored".


"They are held outside for a little while now."
— Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.


"I feel THE POWER!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"I will please you now... THE VOICES!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"My blood will roar with their tears!"
— Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.


"They seem to have all gone boom!"
— Upon getting a Nuke.


"The flames... of the damned!"
— Upon getting a Nuke. A possible reference to a similiar quote in Der Riese.


"Watch them all explode so beautifully!"
— Upon getting a Nuke.


"Attention shoppers, we have a special... ON DEATH!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Oh, I love a good bargain!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Cheaper weapons are a prescription for pain!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Flashy lights! Flashy lights!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Step into the light!"
— Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.


"Yes! She sounds like a sweet little specimen."
— Upon drinking Jugger-nog.


"For the revival of the un-fittest!"
— Upon drinking Quick Revive.


"I can't be sure but I think the active ingredient rots your mind."
— Upon drinking Speed Cola.


"Hmm, I prefer hefeweizen. With some lemon."
— Upon Drinking Double Tap.


"*whistling*"
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"I would hurt so good if I put my hands in there."
— While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"I'm going to kill SOOO many now."
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"The Doctor is ready for war now!"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"The Fatherland would be so proud! It's so emotional..."
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Can you feel their cries coming?"
— After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.


"Hey Dempsey, WATCH YOUR BACK!"
— After receiving an Awful Lawton from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"How wonderfully simplistic!"
— After receiving an Awful Lawton from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"I will make them go boom now!"
— After receiving an Awful lawton from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"What a savage weapon."
— After receiving an Awful Lawton from the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"A crossbow with an explosive round... they think of everything."
— After receiving an Awful Lawton from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"I can blow up so many now!"
— After receiving an Awful Lawton from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"Tic, toc, tic, toc, oh this takes so long!"
— While waiting on the Pack-a-Punch Machine


"So many gears, such German ingenuity!"
— While waiting on the Pack-a-Punch Machine.


"I like the funny sound it makes!"
— After receiving the FN FAL, Ray Gun, Famas, or the Galil from the Mystery Box.


"They will submit to darkness... *high pitched* YES!"
— After getting a HK21 from Mystery Box.


"I can kill more than one at a time!"
— After getting a sniper rifle from the Mystery Box.


"Ugh, this is just so... heavy."
— After getting a sniper rifle from the Mystery Box.


"Ja, this make a big hole! I like big holes."
— After getting a SPAS-12 from Mystery Box.


"They will be all over the floor! Und de valls!! Und the ceiling!"
— After getting an explosive weapon from the Mystery Box.


"I need to hurry up and shoot this!"
— After receiving an explosive weapon from the Mystery Box.


"Could it be? The DG-3!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"Could this be the DG-3, the DG-3 that is just for me? (Laughter)"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"So THIS is what Maxis was keeping secret!"
— After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.


"I will please you now... THE VOICES!"
— After getting a SPAS-12 or China Lake from the Mystery Box


"This will never work!"
— When receiving a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box


"This makes me ANGRY!"
— When receiving a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"The doctor is not pleased."
— When receiving a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Hehe, what is this?"
— When receiving a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Ach, I cannot achieve pleasure with this!"
— When receiving a Python or CZ75 from the Mystery Box.


"Double the medicine!"
— When receiving dual CZ75's from the Mystery Box.


"Yes, more firepower!"
— When receiving dual CZ75's from the Mystery Box.


"I will try to shoot all of their extremities... AT THE SAME TIME!"
— When receiving dual CZ75's from the Mystery Box.


"I have two guns now... JOY!"
— When receiving dual CZ75's from the Mystery Box.


"(singing) Double the pleasure, double the pain, double the damage!"
— When receiving dual CZ75's from the Mystery Box.


"They will be all over the floor, and the walls, and the ceiling!"
— When receiving a China Lake or M72 LAW from the Mystery Box.


"A pity they won't feel their sorrows..."
— When receiving a China Lake, M72 LAW or Crossbow from the Mystery Box.


"I need to hurry up and shoot this!"
— When receiving a China Lake or M72 LAW from the Mystery Box.


"Ratatatatatatata Ratatatata! Ahhahahaha!"
— Upon receiving a G11 from the Mystery Box


"Why do they love you so much, little monkey?"
— After receiving the Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box


"You remind me of Patient 13225, only you make less noise when I stick things in you."
— After receiving the Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box. This is a reference to Element 115, as the square root to 13225 is 115.


"The amazing monkey of POWER!"
— Said after getting a Monkey Bomb from the Mystery Box.


"Joy!"
— After getting a Ray Gun


"Where did you go?"
— When getting a Teddy Bear.


"Samantha? Samantha, where have you run off too?"
— When getting a Teddy Bear.


"But I need your gifts, how can I have them?"
— When getting a Teddy Bear.


"That dreadful little girl continues to make my life difficult."
— When getting a Teddy Bear.


"Samantha, didn't I teach you a lesson about this?"
— When getting a Teddy Bear.


"Ah, das ist good, Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot (Das ist is "that is" in German).


"You take the Illuminati up on their offer, no?"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot.


"Straight shooting from a drunk Russian. How quaint."
— When Nikolai gets a headshot.


"Excellent shooting, Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot.


"Perhaps aim at Dempsey next time."
— When Nikolai gets a headshot.


"I'll buy you some vodka!"
— When Nikolai gets a headshot.


"Don't worry Nikolai, I will probably not let them hurt you."
— When Nikolai is swarmed.


"Back, minions! Stay away from his vodka!"
— When Nikolai gets swarmed.


"I will help you, Russian!"
— When Nikolai gets swarmed.


"The doctor is on his way!"
— When Nikolai gets swarmed.


"Nikolai needs our help!"
— When Nikolai gets swarmed.


"Crawlers, they make such cute noises!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler.


"Nikolai, you've made me a new present!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler.


"Thank you so much for your gift, Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler.


"He looks so cute and happy!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler.


"(High-pitched) A little crawling minion...(Angrily) I WANT ONE!"
— When Nikolai makes a crawler.


"Fuzzy fuzzy, was a monkey!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Give him drink, Nikolai, and send him on his way!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb.


"He causes so much sorrow, Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Oh, joy for Nikolai!"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Do you hear him talking to you, Nikolai?"
— When Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb.


"If I could bottle up your luck, I could make a lot of money, Dempsey."
— When Dempsey gets a headshot.


"Dempsey, you marrow sucking... freakbag, is it?"
— When Dempsey gets a headshot.


"Why don't you just shut your ignorant hole, Dempsey! And your mouth!"
— When Dempsey gets a headshot.


"Dempsey, if you had a brain cell for every headshot, you'd only be stupid!"
— When Dempsey gets a headshot.


"No, Dempsey! I shot that one!"
— When Dempsey gets a headshot.


"You deserve to die, Dempsey!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed.


"I will help you, but only because I want to be the one to eat your heart!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed.


"Dempsey is surrounded! JOY!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed.


"(Tauntingly) Oh, look at the big, brave American soldier, needing help from the doctor!"
— When Dempsey is swarmed.


"(Laughs) Dempsey's being tortured by my little friends."
— When Dempsey is swarmed.


"One day, I will taste your tears, Dempsey."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"I hate you Dempsey. I even hate your eyes."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"Dempsey has made a crawler. Now everyone can do it."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"You have made them multiply. Maybe that's how YOU got here!"
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"Dempsey, look at what you have done! *clicks tongue*"
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"You are so annoying, Dempsey."
— When Dempsey makes a crawler.


"Nein! Dempsey shouldn't be allowed to have this much fun!"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Oh, Dempsey, you are now my favorite."
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.


"You see the family resemblance, American."
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Oh, how I hate you now, little monkey."
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Not Dempsey! He doesn't deserve the fun!"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb.


"Alas, the doctor is too poor to buy this..."
— When attempt to buy something without requisite points.


"What?! I am nothing but a peasant!"
— When attempting to buy something without requisite points.


"How can the doctor be so poor?"
— When attempting to buy something without requisite points.


"The infernal box will not give it's secrets freely..."
— When attempting to use the Mystery Box without the required points.


"1..2..3..Oh shit."
— When being swarmed.


"THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!"
— When being swarmed.


"Why has everyone abandoned the Doctor?"
— When being swarmed.


"No! The Doctor could use some help about now!"
— When being swarmed.


"My patience is at an end. YOU WILL DIE NOW!"
— When being swarmed.


"How have you all been? Ja, good... TIME TO DIE!"
— When being swarmed.


"Yes, my children, gather around...*nervous laughter*"
— When being swarmed.


"Let me tell you a story about your doom!"
— When being swarmed.


"Oh, it must be playtime!"
— When being swarmed.


"Glad to meet you all! I am the Doctor!"
— When being swarmed.


"Time to RUN!!!"
— When being swarmed.


"My fame has preceded me."
— When being swarmed.


"Have you heard? It's your time to go."
— When being swarmed.


"Why won't they stop talking to me?"
— When being swarmed.


"You should go follow Dempsey now!"
— When being swarmed.


"Nein, this is not the time to stalk the doctor!"
— When being swarmed.


"You are all getting so close... YOU WILL DIE NOW!"
— When being swarmed.


"Ah, the bathroom, not a very interesting place, unless you're German... LIKE ME!!!"
— Upon entering the bathroom.


"Doctor Maxis almost had his undead army, if only he could have broken the trust barrier."
— Upon entering the dressing room.


"Those seats, that screen, they wanted to implant the mind with instructions!"
— Upon entering the theater.


"An ally, how quaint."
— Upon entering the alley.


"They are shaking down the roof, what a pity!"
— After turning on the power.


"That doesn't sound good."
— After turning on the power.


"What is that beautiful sound? It's like MUSIC!"
— After turning on the power.


"The beautiful creatures fall from the sky!"
— After turning on the power.


"These must have been the failed experiments Maxis mentioned."
— After turning on the power.


"I found a piece of the meteor!"
— After found the first piece of the meteor.


"I found another rock! Maybe they stole this from Japan!"
— Finding the second piece of the meteor. Reference to the meteor in Shi No Numa


"I have found the last piece!"
— Finding the last Meteor.


"I have found a delicious tune!"
— Upon activating the "115" song easter-egg.


"How can I download this to my MP3 player?"
— Upon activating the "115" song easter-egg.


"Oh look, it's me... but not quite as magnificent!"
— After examining his portrait.


"Hello Dempsey. Oh, wait, its just a portrait... AN UGLY ONE!"
— After examining Dempsey's portrait.


"His eyes are following me!"
— After examining Nikolai's portrait.


"Oh, it's a picture of the Monkey Bomb!"
— After examining Takeo's portrait.


"This one didn't photograph so well."
— After examining the blacked-out portrait.


"I have been recognized by Treyar... the Illuminati!"
— When earning an achievement (refers to Treyarch).


"OHHHH! The Wunderwaffe DG-2! (slighty cries) I missed you!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"This will be the SHOCK!....of a lifetime...(giggles)"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Oh, the element of POWER!!"
— Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box


"Can it be the DG-3? The DG-3 that's just for me?"
— When receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-3 JZ from the Pack-a-Punch machine.


"Listen, do you hear its joy?"
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"The Doctor sends his regards!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"Shocking! *laughter*"
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"Feel the power of the element!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"Samantha, is that you? You mustn't tell anyone!"
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"Ohh, what I wouldn't give to feel that kind of power."
— Upon getting a kill with the Wunderwaffe DG-2.


"Burn them... burn them, yes, BURN SO NICELY!"
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"So heavy, so hot, so... handsome."
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"They bathe in their anguished cries!"
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"The Doctor is ready to boil them into submission."
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"Shut up, shut up, or I will BURN out your eyes!"
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"Liverwurst, anyone? (laughter)"
— Upon receiving the flamethrower from the Mystery Box.


"He... He-he's BURNING! (crying) Oh joy!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"Oh, do you smell the cooked intestine? Delicious."
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"The flames! Oh, the glorious flames!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"*laughter*"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.


"Fry, my pretties! Fry!"
— Killing zombies with the flamethrower.

Samantha MaxisEdit

"Fetch me their souls!"
— At begining of a Hellhound round.


"Bye bye!"
— When a player revives the Teddy Bear in the Mystery Box.


"Kaboom!"
— When a Nuke power-up is picked up.


"Carpenter!"
— When a Carpenter power-up is picked up.


"Insta-kill!"
— When an Insta-kill power-up is picked up.


"Fire Sale!"
— When a Fire Sale power-up is picked up.


"Max Ammo!"
— When a Max Ammo power-up is picked up.


"Double points!"
— When a Double Points power-up is picked up.


"Attention, Zombie shoppers! Time for a Fire Sale. Until the music stops, box rolls ten Dollars, at a convenient location near you! (evil laugh)"
— A longer version of the Fire Sale announcement, found in PC files.


TriviaEdit

  • Sometimes, when playing as Richtofen on Solo, he will say a multiplayer quote that involves Tank Dempsey.
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