This page is getting hit hard! We need to buy it some time!
This page is protected from edits made by unregistered users due to recent vandalism and/or a surge in traffic.
If you feel that something on this page needs to be changed, discuss it on the talk page.
Tank Dempsey
Beginning
- "No power, no glory."
- — At the beginning.
- "Are you freakin' kidding me? No power!"
- — At the beginning.
- "Well well well. Look's like there ain't no power."
- — At the beginning.
- "Gotta have to get the power on, it's like déjà vu all over again."
- — At the beginning.
- "Yep, just as I suspected. We need to get the power on."
- — At the beginning.
- "No power. How original."
- — Beginning a match
Cut Quotes
- "The Waffle! Killing zombies made easy in one single step. Batteries included."
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box. (Said in a very fast, commercial-sounding voice.)
- "Element 115. Concentrated to a single beam of pure badassery...wait...how the hell do I know that?"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box. Note reference to the brainwashing effect caused by Element 115 on Takeo, Nikolai, and Dempsey.
- "The DG-2... one slick piece of machinery."
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "Wonder Waffle...yeah. Thing 'o beauty."
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "Hey zombies! You like Waffles?"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "Welcome to the party meatsacks!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "They got ZERO chance against me and the Wonder Waffle!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "You see that? HOLY SHIT BALLS!"
- — Killing zombie/s with the Wunderwaffe DG-2
- "Time to fry freakmaggots!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "BZZZ! ZAP! Woohoo!"
- — Killing zombie/s with the Wunderwaffe DG-2
Killing a Zombie
- "Back off meatmouth!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Look at that mess I made...Oorah."
- — After killing lots of zombies in a row.
- "Gotta give ya credit zombie, you got no quit in ya!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Stay dead cheesehead!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Eat my blade, maggot-sack!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Taste this, bone-junkie!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "RARGH!!!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Die, DIE!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Blow them to high hell!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "AWESOME!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Hey, freak-bag! You need to learn a way to die!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "I've gave him credit, he's not about to quit!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "I guess they need to get blowed up again!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Stupid undead flesh monkeys! You're dead already!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "There's just something so beautiful about blowing shit up!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Blood-sucking gutter-slugs you're goin' out Dempsy's style!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Oo-fuckin'-rah!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Whoo-hoo!"
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "If I keep this up I'm gonna run out of zombies!"
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "Argh! Fuck me that smells!"
- — After killing a Gas Zombie.
- "Richtofen lay off the sourkraut man!"
- — After killing a Gas Zombie
- "How do ya like that, creepy crawler!"
- — After killing a Gas Zombie.
- "He just... he just blew all over the place! *laughs* Wow!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Lets send those freakbags back to 1946!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Okay, woah! That was bad-ass!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Killing zombies in one simple step! Batteries no included."
- — When getting multiple kills with the Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Slaying zombies since 1945!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Die you undead flesh-whores!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Hey zombies, you're dying over here!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Enough dead for a Goth party!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "You keep coming, I'll keep killing!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Okay, let's see, a thousand zombies, and one Dempsey; yeah that seems fair."
- — Upon multiple kills.
Being hit by a Zombie
- "Eat it ya nasty squag!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "Die you undead flesh-addict!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "K to the I to the A Zombitch!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him, reference to status K.I.A (Killed in Action)
Hellhound
- "Ah great... this again!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Bring on the dogs!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "I ain't gonna be any puppy's chew toy!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Time to put you down puppy-dog!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Fetch my grenade, devil voice!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Fuck you, Fido!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "Down boy!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "That's the last leg you'll ever hump!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
Downed or revived
- "Fuckers caught me napping!"
- — When downed.
- "Man down, MAN DOWN!"
- — When downed.
- "Argh... this is embarrassing!"
- — When downed.
- "I hope you choke, meat-sack!"
- — When downed.
- "Lucky bone-sucking maggot-whores... they're reeealy gonna pay now!"
- — After being revived.
- "Whatever... even a blind squirrel is right twice a day."
- — After being revived.
- "So they got a little lucky... WHAT?!"
- — After being revived.
- ""Don't worry, just tripped.""
- — After being revived.
Ammo
- "Feeling light... need the juice."
- — When low ammo.
- "Need some juice soon!"
- — When low ammo.
- "Need some more ammo..."
- — When out of ammo.
- "Knee deep in zombie shit with no ammo, glorious!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Hey player! We need ammo or we're going down!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Hey player! Drop the chips and get me some ammo!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I need to find some lead or I'm gonna get bored here!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Damn! I'm out of juice!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Gonna have to round up some rounds!"
- — When low on ammo or out of ammo.
- "I need more ammunition! Ahh!! Ahh!!"
- — When low on ammo or out of ammo.
- "What's that clicking noise?"
- — When attempting to fire an empty gun.
Buying weapons off the wall
- "The only thing better than a M16 is... well, two M16s!"
- — After buying a M16 off the wall.
- "Ah, the M16. 5.56 millimeter magazine-fed gas-operated sweetness... just like me."
- — After buying a M16 off the wall.
- "Wonder if they'll even know what hit them."
- — After buying a M14 off the wall.
- "Little gun, lots of holes!"
- — Buying a SMG off the wall
- "I'm gonna spill their guts all over the place, haha!"
- — After buying an Olympia off the wall.
- "Nothing like a SMG!"
- — After buying an AK-74u off the wall.
- "Hey zombie! Wanna try out my new gun?"
- — Buying an SMG off the wall
Power-up
- "Whoo! More shit to kill with!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "RE-JUICED!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "Ammunition on the house!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "Wait, we ARE keeping score?"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "Shoot 'em up!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "Well, that'll keep 'em.... for now."
- — Upon getting a Carpenter power-up
- "NUUUKE!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "KA-BOOOOM!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "Eat that ya undead flesh monkeys!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "Man up Zombies, it's time to die."
- — Upon getting Insta-Kill.
Perk-a-Cola
- "Tastes like... fermented herring dipped in cat piss... ugh."
- — Upon drinking Quick Revive.
- "Ahhh, that hit the spot"
- — Upon drinking Speed-cola.
- "Reach for me, Jugger-Girl... oo-rah."
- — Upon drinking Jugger-nog.
- "Ugh, why is this stuff so damn chewy?"
- — Upon drinking Double Tap Root Beer.
Pack-a-Punch
- "I wonder if Richtofen has gears like that in his head."
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "Man... I wish we could replace Richtofen with a hot chick, I'm getting lonely here."
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "Pack a punch, just like me."
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "C'mon Pack-a-Punch, you better hurry up!"
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "Hell yeah, Dempsy gets an upgrade!"
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "Bring it on, freak-sacks!"
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
Mystery Box
- "Time to die, bone-jaw!"
- — After getting a Commando from Mystery Box.
- "Little gun, lot's of holes."
- — After getting a Spectre from Mystery Box.
- "No more nice guy bone-jaw, I'm gonna kick your ass."
- — After getting a SPAS-12 from Mystery Box.
- "Time to make some noise!"
- — After getting a HS-10 from Mystery Box.
- "Well, I see the future hasn't changed anything! Fucking box!"
- — After getting a Python from Mystery Box.
- "That's just craptastic!"
- — After getting a CZ75 from Mystery Box.
- "Monkey! So glad to see you again, buddy!"
- — After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.
- "Aww, what a cute little bundle of C4!"
- — After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.
- "Looks like the future hasn't changed anything. Stupid bear."
- — After getting a Teddy Bear from Mystery Box.
- "Can't roll the dice if I can't place a bet!"
- — When trying to use the Mystery Box without enough points.
- "Oh, they are gonna dig this!!!"
- — After Recieving the ray gun.
- "Check out those cool lights and buttons..."
- — After receiving the Thundergun.
Other
- "And you thought I couldn't find this place."
- — Upon entering the bathroom at first floor.
- "No time for sugar baby, I'm here to check the meter!"
- — Upon entering the dressing room.
- "Hey, I'm outside!"
- — Upon gaining access to the alley.
- "I always did want a spot on the big screen."
- — After the power is turned on.
- "Looks like part of a meteor."
- — After found the first piece of the meteor.
- "Here's another one!"
- — After found the second piece of the meteor
- "That has to be the last one."
- — After found the last piece of the meteor.
- "I found the hidden song, awesome."
- — Upon activating the "115" song easter egg.
- "I found the hidden song!"
- — Upon activating the "115" song easter egg.
- "A tale of two Dempseys, starts slow but has a happy ending."
- — After examining his portrait.
- "Whoa, looks like Nikolai has put on a few pounds. What's he been eatin'?"
- — After examining Nikolai's portrait.
- "Aww, our little bundle of badass."
- — After examining Takeo's portrait.
- "He's portrait bigger than anyone else is. Must be trying to compensate for something."
- — Upon examining Richtofen's portrait.
- "Hey look! It's nobody!"
- — After examining the blacked-out portrait.
Nikolai Belinski
Beginning
- "Maybe someone should go turn on the power now."
- — At the beginning.
- "No power! Just like home!"
- — At the beginning.
- "I think we need to do something about the power."
- — At the beginning.
- "Who didn't pay the electric bill?"
- — At the beginning.
- "We should go find the fuse box."
- — At the beginning.
Cut Quotes
- "Oh great! It's the Wonderfulwaffle!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "This has more power than Moscow Electric Company!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "This ALMOST as strong as the best Russian vodka."
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
Killing a Zombie
- "You cannot even beat a drunk Soviet!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "The Red Army cannot be overun!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Out of my way piz-da!"
- — Upon getting a kill. "piz-da" means "pussy" in Russian.
- "No! No vodka for you!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Die, Satan's minions!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Die by the hand of Nikolai! Hey, that rhymes..."
- — After a knife kill.
- "Die now, son of bitch!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "You got slime on my new shirt! Now I have to dry clean!"
- — Killing a Gas Zombie at close range
- "Now that's what I call a goulash!"
- — Killing multiple zombies with an explosive weapon
- "You fall like coddled bourgeois!"
- — Multiple kills
- "STAY AWAY FROM MY VODKA! What? It's a classic!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Euuuaaaaghhhhhh!!"
- — After a knife kill
- "This fucking gun is amazing!"
- — Getting multiple kills with the Ray Gun
- "Now they're here, now they're not. Such is life in the...ah, fuck you."
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Explosives make things so much easier!"
- — After an explosive kill or Ray Gun kill.
- "BOOM! You are dead!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Have a round on me! Get it? A "round"? Eh.. never mind, fuck you."
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "Don't slip in the slime!"
- — Upon killing a Gas Zombie.
- "What is that smell? Maybe I sharted..."
- — Upon killing a gas zombie
- "You got slime on my uniform!"
- — Upon killing a Gas Zombie.
- "That smells disgusting... like my fourth wife. She pretty though... pretty and smelly, weird combo."
- — Upon killing a Gas Zombie.
- "Like the Fist of Stalin... up your ass!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Feel the might of the Red Army!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "Do svidaniya, bitches!"
- — Upon multiple kills. Do sdivania means "Good Bye" in Russian
- "Never mess with a Russian when drinks are on the line!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Nikolai cannot die! Hey, that rhymes!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Die, demon hell-pigs!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "I just killed a billion zombies... why is no one helping?"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Hey, you left your arm behind!"
- — After destroying a zombie's limb.
- "From Russia with great affection!"
- — After killing a zombie, a reference to the movie From Russia with Love.
Being hit by a Zombie
- "I like it rough, but not that rough."
- — When getting attacked by a zombie.
- "OW! My shins!"
- — When getting attacked by a crawler.
- "Hey, what's that? Oh, crawler!"
- — When getting attacked by a crawler.
- "You know how to say "owned" in Russian? OWNT!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "No it's my vodka! MINE! MY OWN!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "No touchie! ...I have issues."
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "You are dead now! But you were dead before! Ahh fuck you!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "You see what happens when you touch Nikolai?!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
Hellhound
- "Come play "Fetch the Grenade", demon-spawn!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "They're trying to fetch our souls again!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "You don't want my soul, it probably tastes like vodka. Mmm... vodka."
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Out of my way, suka!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound
- "Die, demon-spawn!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "No soul for you!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "Ugh...I think I got fur in my mouth"
- — Killing a Hellhound
Down or revived
- "I have made mess in trousers..."
- — When downed.
- "Well, maybe I have time for drink."
- — When downed.
- "Do not leave me to the maggots!"
- — When downed.
- "Oh, I feel stupid..."
- — When downed.
- "Come back! Nikolai can still fight!"
- — When downed.
- "Wha-what? I was only taking a nap!"
- — After being revived.
- "You see what happened to me, there were thousands!"
- — After being revived.
- "All right, all right, I'll get up all ready, sheesh..... like mother."
- — After being revived.
- "What? Break-time's over now?"
- — After being revived.
- "How do you say... "thank you" in Idiot?"
- — After being revived.
Ammo
- "Running low on ammunition!"
- — When low on ammo.
- "Running low on ammo! I'm drunk..."
- — When low ammo.
- "It's that clicking again! Oh, ammo!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I'm out of ammo! Maybe I should just drink instead... piss on someone..."
- — When out of ammo.
- "When did I run out of ammo?"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Why is no one caring about my lack of ammo?"
- — When out of ammo.
- "Greedy capitalists dogs! Give me ammo!"
- — When out of ammo
- "Why am I always needing more ammo?"
- — When out of ammo.
- "If I don't find ammo, I'll have to kill them with my breath!"
- — When out of ammo.
Buying off weapons off the wall
- "Holding this up makes my arms so tired!"
- — After buying a M14 off the wall.
- "Hey, snipers may wear diapers, but we get all the ladies."
- — Upon buying an M14 off the wall.
- "Great! I can camp now! I hate moving around so much..."
- — Upon buying an M14
- "Alright, who else want to try and take me?"
- — After buying any SMG off the wall.
- "Come baby...we do the 59, eh? He he..."
- — After buying any SMG from the wall.
- "This is "nice and light"..."
- — After buying any SMG off the wall.
- "This will make demon-holes nicely!"
- — After buying any SMG from the wall.
- "A shotgun, now I just need a shot glass! He he!"
- — After buying an Olympia off the wall.
- "Please, I have no job!"
- — When attempt to buy a weapon without requisite points.
- "Such strength, such craftsmanship. Must be made in Motherland!"
- — -When buying the Bowie Knife
Power-up
- "Just what the doctor ordered!"
- — Upon receiving a "Max-Ammo" power-up.
- "Why am I so heavy now?"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "This is proper socialist reform!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "It is happy hour!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "Vodka for everybody!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "Capitalists...if you can't beat them...you know..."
- — Upon getting a Fire-Sale power-up
- "Salute!"
- — Upon getting the Nuke power-up
- "What's happening? That music sucks."
- — Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.
- "Nikolai is coming for you!"
- — Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.
- "A salute to the nuclear bomb!"
- — Upon getting the Nuke power-up
- "I drink to the nuclear bomb!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "Thank you!... disembodied girl voice!"
- — Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.
- "Great, I don't have to do anything!"
- — Upon getting the Carpenter power-up.
Perk-a-Cola
- "I think Dempsey is right. It is a bit fishy."
- — Upon drinking Quick Revive.
- "Reach for vodka tooooniiiiggghhht..."
- — Upon drinking Jugger-nog.
- "Why can I see so clearly now?"
- — Upon drinking Speed Cola.
- "My tap is doubled, but not my vodka."
- — When Double Tap Root Beer is bought.
Pack-a-Punch
- "This is like standing in grocery line!"
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "This better be good... costed enough!"
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "Don't worry guys! Nikolai is coming for you!"
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "Oh, I like, it's pretty!"
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "Such power, so smooth! Maybe this upgraded weapon is nice too..."
- — Upon receiving a Pack-A-Punched weapon.
- "Hurryhurryhurryhurryhurryhurry.......come on!!"
- — Putting a gun in the Pack-A-Punch machine
Mystery Box
- "I've got ninety-nine problems, but a gun ain't one, da!"
- — After getting an Assault Rifle Galil from Mystery Box. A reference to "99 Problems,"a song by Jay-Z.
- "I love this effing gun! Get it? FN? Just like... fuck!"
- — After getting a FN FAL from Mystery Box.
- "Snipers may wear diapers, but they get all the ladies!"
- — After getting a sniper rifle from Mystery Box (also said after buying an M14).
- "Hello beautiful, I'll 'cock' you gently."
- — After getting a gun from Mystery Box.
- "I never met an MG I didn't like"
- — Upon getting an SMG from the Mystery Box
- "Why? Why do you treat me like this?"
- — After getting a Python from Mystery Box.
- "Come box, share with me your treasures, not your junk!"
- — After getting a CZ75 from Mystery Box.
- "Ah, two pistols are better than one! And one pistol is better than... what?"
- — After getting a Dual-Wielded CZ75 from Mystery Box.
- "I will be able to take them out gangsta' style now!"
- — After getting a Dual Wielded CZ75 from Mystery Box.
- "This makes Nikolai very happy, like first date! ...I bring home flowers!"
- — After getting a China Lake from Mystery Box.
- "I drank so much, I moved to the future!"
- — After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.
- "Such power... Such pride! It must be Russian made!"
- — Upon receiving the Thundergun
- "Hello Ray. Would you like to taste my vodka?"
- — After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.
- "This looks like it comes from space, no?"
- — After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box
- "First it takes my money, then it disappears... just like my fourth wife!"
- — After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.
- "This little girl and her games. It's a sign of bad parenting."
- — After getting a Teddy Bear from the Mystery Box.
- "Oh well, maybe I'll just sit here and nap."
- — When trying to use Mystery Box without requisite points.
- "Fuck you, monkey!"
- — After receiving a Monkey Bomb.
- "I hate those fucking Monkeys."
- — When getting the Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box
- "This must be vodka power."
- — Nikolai after obtain Thundergun from box.
- "What?! That stripper must have stolen my money!"
- — Trying to use the Mystery Box without enough points
Other
- "The film must have been shit, this place is full of stiffs!"
- — Upon turning on the power.
- "Why do they insist on picking on me?"
- — While being being chased by a swarm of zombies
- "I will piss in style here!"
- — Upon entering the bathroom in first floor.
- "Another dark alley, I know this well."
- — Upon gaining access to the alley.
- "Hey Dempsey, I think you left your blush here!"
- — Upon gaining access to the dressing room.
- "Oh I found a rock, great."
- — After finding the first piece of the meteor.
- "I found another rock... but no vodka!"
- — After finding the second piece of the meteor.
- "I admire your aim Tank, but not your sobriety."
- — Rarely said when playing splitscreen and player 1 gets multiple headshots.
- "Well, they do say the screen puts on ten pounds."
- — After examining his portrait.
- "Hey Dempsey! I think they got your bad side!"
- — After examining Dempsey's portrait.
- "I hate you, Takeo."
- — After examining Takeo's portrait.
- "Richtofen looks a little younger in this picture."
- — After examining Richtofen's portrait.
- "Hey! Someone took the image from this picture!"
- — After examining the blacked-out portrait.
- "I'll rescue you, but only because you owe me from last time!"
- — When Takeo is being chased by a swarm of Zombies
- "Richtofen, your children are becoming annoying!"
- — Upon being chased by a swarm of Zombies.
- "Oh, look! Our Mighty Warrior surrounded again!"
- — Upon seeing Takeo chased by a swarm of Zombies.
Takeo Masaki
Beginning
- "We need to bring light to this dark place."
- — At the beginning.
- "There seems to be no power!"
- — At the beginning.
- "There is no power now! Perhaps there never was."
- — At the beginning.
- "We should go find the power box."
- — At the beginning.
Cut Quotes
- "This will make for a fun time!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "I will SHOCK them into submission!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "I finally get the turn...with the Wunderwaffe."
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "BEHOLD! The Electric Katana!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "It is on now freakbags!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box (quoting Dempsey)
Killing a Zombie
- "Shi-Ne!"
- — Upon getting a kill. "Shi-Ne" means "die" in Japanese.
- "My honor is bigger than yours!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "You die with no honor!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Takeo one, Zombie zero!"
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "Pew pew pew, ha ha ha."
- — Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.
- "With the force of one thousand wombats YOU DIE!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Ugh, that thing couldn't possibly have been human!"
- — Upon killing a gas zombie.
- "Smells like rotten sushi!"
- — Upon killing a gas zombie.
- "Hyah!"
- — Upon getting a knife kill
Being hit by a Zombie
- "You kill me? No! I kill you!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "Not on this day, tormented soul!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "You had an unhappy ending! Ha ha ha!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "You lack focus!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
Hellhound
- "I fear no dog!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Die, demon-spawn!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
Downed or revived
- "This is not how I wish to die!"
- — When downed
- "This is without reason!"
- — When downed
- "I have fallen into darkness!"
- — While downed
- "Your karma has approved"
- — After being revived
Ammo
- "Need more ammunition!"
- — When low ammo
- "A true warrior needs no weapon!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I have no ammo. I have no honor."
- — When out of ammo.
- "I will crush them with my bare hands!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I am still better off with the Arisaka."
- — When out of ammo.
Buying off weapons off the wall
- "I will fire honor at them mightily!"
- — After buying a PM63 off the wall.
- "I will show them the path!"
- — After buying a MPL off the wall.
- "I need more honor!"
- — When trying to buy a weapon without requisite points.
- "This weapon is lighter than a feather, but twice as deadly."
- — After buying the AK74U off of the wall.
- "One by one, I shall curse them from afar!"
- — After buying the M14 off of the wall.
Power-ups
- "Double the honor!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "You will feel the power in my veins!"
- — Upon getting an Insta-Kill power-up.
- "Quick, kill as many as you can!"
- — Upon getting a Carpenter power-up
- "That will keep them out for a thousand years... eh, a few seconds."
- — Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.
- "Let the light of a thousand suns purify your souls!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "Destruction rains on the unholy!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "...Nice timing!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
Perk-a-Colas
- "Hmm, a drink that requires a... mature palette."
- — Upon drinking Quick Revive.
- "Speed Cola speed up your might!"
- — Upon drinking Speed Cola.
- "I am fast shooting Eastern cowboy!"
- — Upon drinking Double Tap Root Beer.
Pack-a-Punch
- "This will make a weapon that will honor my ancestors."
- — After putting a weapon inside the Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "A weapon is an extension of ones ownself."
- — After taking a newly upgraded weapon out of the Pack-a-Punch.
Mystery Box
- "I cannot be defeated!...Probably..."
- — After getting an AUG from Mystery Box.
- "I will turn them into red mist!"
- — After getting a G11 from Mystery Box.
- "Light as a feather, and twice as deadly!"
- — After getting a Spectre from Mystery Box.
- "I will steal what honor they have left!"
- — After getting a L96A1 from Mystery Box.
- "This does not suit a warrior!"
- — After getting a Python from Mystery Box.
- "A worthless weapon, from an honorless box!"
- — After getting a CZ75 from Mystery Box.
- "This gun fires pure honor!"
- — After getting a Ray Gun from Mystery Box.
- "I have acquired the Thundergun!"
- — After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.
- "*chuckling* The Emperor would be amused!"
- — After getting a Monkey Bomb from Mystery Box.
- "I am not yet ready for the ways of the box."
- — When attempting to use the Mystery Box without requisite points.
Other
- "Just breathe on them!"
- — After Nikolai comments about getting swarmed.
- "Oh!... Sounds like a big monster is attacking the building."
- — After turning on the electricity. A reference to the film, "Godzilla".
- "I found a piece of the meteor!"
- — After found the first piece of the meteor.
- "I found another piece of the meteor! Maybe they stole this from Japan!"
- — Finding the second piece of the meteor. A reference to the meteor at Shi No Numa.
- "I have found a grand secret!"
- — Upon activating the "115" song easter egg.
- "A picture of a great warrior!"
- — After examining his portrait.
- "Here is a picture of an ugly American! Eugh!"
- — After examining Dempsey's portrait.
- "The Russian is so drunk, I can smell his breath through this portrait!"
- — After examining Nikolai's portrait.
- "Perhaps what once was, is no more, but shall be again!"
- — When examining the blacked out portrait.
- "Honor to the doctor!"
- — After examining Richtofen's portrait.
Edward Richtofen
Beginning
- "Oh joy! No power!"
- — At the beginning.
- "*impatiently* Ja, ja, the power needs to be turned on."
- — At the beginning
- "I cannot torture my minions without power... Dempsey, you go turn it on."
- — At the beginning.
- "Powerpowerpowerpower! It's always the first priority!"
- — At the beginning.
- "There is no power, how suspicious... or OBVIOUS!"
- — At the beginning.
Cut Quotes
- "I have been recognized by Treyar--the Illuminati!"
- — Unknown (Refers to Treyarch)
- "OHHHH! The Wunderwaffe DG-2! (slighty cries) I missed you!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "This will be the SHOCK!....of a lifetime...(giggles)"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
- "Oh, the element of POWER!!"
- — Receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-2 from the Mystery Box
=
- "Can it be the DG-3? The DG-3 Just for me?"
- — When receiving the Wunderwaffe DG-3 JZ from the Pack-a-Punch machine.
Killing a Zombie
- "Ah, the smell of delicate flesh, ja..."
- — When Richtofen kills a large number of zombies
- "Do you feel it? Oh I hope you did..."
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "Yes, COME TO ME, minions!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "I take your pain, I put my straw in it, *slurping noises* AND I DRINK IT UP!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "It hurts, doesn't it? GOOD!"
- — Upon getting a kill.
- "The life has been sucked out of that one"
- — Upon getting a kill
- "Aaaand... he is no longer with us"
- — Upon getting an explosive kill
- "Ah, smell so wunderbar!"
- — After a knife kill. "wunderbar" means "wonderful" in German.
- "No more Doctor Nice Guy!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "THE BLOOD! THE BEAUTIFUL BLOOD!"
- — After a knife kill.
- "Tiny little organ parts for everybody!"
- — Killing a zombie with explosives.
- "Oh, the lovely blood!"
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "How can I hear the screams when it has no mouth?"
- — Upon getting a headshot.
- "Oh, the showers of the damned!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "*sings* Fountains of sorrow..."
- — After an explosive kill.
- "Yes, YES, explode!"
- — After an explosive kill.
- "*sings* All hail the Fuhrer..."
- — Upon detonation of an explosive that killed a zombie.
- "He went *splat*."
- — Upon getting a kill with Olympia.
- "Where did it go? I don't know! Do you?"
- — Upon getting a kill with Ray Gun.
- "Do you like my glowing green balls?"
- — Getting a kill with the Ray Gun
- "Poof! You are gone!"
- — Getting a kill with the Ray Gun
- "He's become random bits of joy!"
- — Getting a kill with the Ray Gun
- "The powers of nature at my fingertips!"
- — Upon getting a kill with Thundergun/Zeus Cannon.
- "They are hurting... we must help them!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "This is MY creation! And I will destroy it! AND clean it up!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Ja, ja... DIE!!!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Don't be afraid of death, be afraid of THE DOCTOR!!!"
- — Upon multiple kills.
- "Squishy Squishy little bug"
- — Upon killing a gas zombie
- "Now there is puss everywhere"
- — Upon killing a gas zombie
- "No, no! You're not supposed to fall apart like that!"
- — After dismembering a zombie
- "He can no longer fight, he is DISARMED! Ha ha!"
- — After shooting off a zombie's hand or arm
- "Look at it, crawling to me!"
- — After destroying a zombie's leg.
- "It has no legs, but still moves. Interesting."
- — After destroying a zombie's leg.
- "Dempsey, if you had a brain for everytime you had a headshot...you'd be stupid"
- — After achieving multiple headshots in a row.
Being hit by a Zombie
- "I can smell my own blood! FEAR ME!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "Get off my legs, minion!"
- — When getting attacked by a crawler.
- "Just DIE!"
- — upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "How DARE you touch the doctor?"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- "LEAVE ME BE!"
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
- ""Don't touch the doctor!"
- — Upon being attacked by a zombie.
- "No touching the doctor, unless he asks..."
- — Upon killing a zombie that attacked him.
Hellhound
- "Aww, the poor puppies!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "NEIN! NOT THE PUPPIES!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round. (Nein is German for No).
- "What have you done to the POOR PUPPIES?!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "Mommy told me not to hurt animals any more!"
- — At the beginning of a Hellhound round.
- "My mother told me to stop hurting animals."
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "Go back to Maxis, Samantha!"
- — Upon killing a Hellhound.
- "My poor little accidents... STAY AWAY!"
- — At the start of a Hellhound round
Downed or revived
- "IT TICKLES! IT TICKLES! I KNEW IT, IT TICKLES!"
- — When downed.
- "IT CANNOT BE! I'M DOWN!"
- — When downed.
- "No, no. I am not ready for hell, I don't even have my good shoes."
- — When downed.
- "I'll get you something nice when this is over."
- — After being revived.
- "I am ALIVE!!!"
- — After being revived
- "Did the voices tell you to save me?"
- — After being revived.
- "Ja, danke!"
- — After being revived ('danke' is 'thanks' in German).
Ammo
- "Low on ammo!"
- — When low on ammo.
- "How can I be running out of ammo?!"
- — When low ammo
- "Without bullets I will have to resort to... STABBING!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I need to find some ammunition... *wailing*"
- — When out of ammo.
- "No ammo is no fun!"
- — When out of ammo.
- "I have no ammunition."
- — When out of ammo.
- "No rounds, no wounds, NO JOY!"
- — When out of ammo.
Buying weapons off the wall
- "Yes, now their kidneys will be all MINE! And none for you, Dempsey."
- — After buying a M14 off the wall.
- "What? The voices are louder!"
- — Upon buying a MP5K off the wall.
- "Oh, this is just so heavy!"
- — Buying M14 off the wall
- "A MP40! Wunderbar!"
- — Upon buying a MP40 off the wall.
- "Yes, my children, I am coming!"
- — Upon buying an Olympia off the wall.
- "Of course they still have the BEST WEAPON EVER MADE HERE!"
- — Buying MP40 off the wall
- "An autopsy is more easily performed with a shotgun."
- — Upon buying a Stakeout off the wall.
- "The Doctor is well-armed!"
- — After buying a SMG off the wall
- "What?! I am nothing but a peasant!"
- — When attempting to buy a weapon without requisite points.
Power-ups
- "A gift from Sam? But why?!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "More time to play with my pretty ones!"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "Ammo to the max, ja?"
- — Upon getting a Max Ammo power-up.
- "Attention shoppers, we have a special... on death!"
- — Upon getting a Fire Sale power-up.
- "MORE SCORE!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "I am paid for pain!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
- "This must be the work of the Masons."
- — Upon getting a Carpenter power-up.
- "I feel some power!"
- — Upon getting a Insta-Kill power-up.
- "They seem to have all gone boom!"
- — Upon getting a nuke
- "The flames... of the damned!"
- — Upon getting a Nuke.
- "I get double the points because of my efforts!"
- — Upon getting a Double Points power-up.
Perk-a-Colas
- "Yes! She sounds like a sweet little specimen."
- — Upon drinking Jugger-nog.
- "For the revival of the un-fittest!"
- — Upon drinking Quick Revive.
- "I can't be sure but I think the active ingredient rots your mind."
- — Upon drinking Speed Cola.
Pack-a-Punch
- "*whistling*"
- — While waiting for Pack-a-Punch Machine.
- "I'm going to kill SOOO many now."
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "The Doctor is ready for war now!"
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "The Fatherland would be so proud! Such a shame..."
- — After receiving a Pack-a-Punched weapon.
- "This machine takes so long!"
- — While waiting on the Pack-a-Punch Machine
Mystery Box
- "I like the funny sound it makes!"
- — After receiving the FN FAL, Ray Gun, or the Galil from the Mystery Box.
- "They will submit to darkness... YES!"
- — After getting a HK21 from Mystery Box.
- "I can kill more than one at a time!"
- — After getting a sniper rifle from the Mystery Box.
- "Ugh, this is just so... heavy."
- — After getting a sniper rifle from the Mystery Box.
- "Ja, this make a big hole! I like it..."
- — After getting a SPAS-12 from Mystery Box.
- "They will be all over the walls! And the ceiling! And the floor!"
- — After getting an explosive weapon from the Mystery Box.
- "Could it be? The DG-3!"
- — After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.
- "Could this be the DG-3, the DG-3 that is just for me?"
- — After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.
- "So THIS is what Maxis was keeping from me!"
- — After getting a Thundergun from Mystery Box.
- "I will please you now... THE VOICES!"
- — After getting a SPAS-12 or China Lake from the Mystery Box
- "Samantha, I talked to you about this."
- — After getting a Teddy Bear from Mystery Box.
- "Maybe you move it... because you like me?"
- — After the Mystery Box teleports
- "RATATATATATATAT!!"
- — Upon receiving a sub-machinegun from the Mystery Box
- "Why do they love you so much, little monkey?"
- — After recieving the Monkey Bomb from the Mystic Box
- "Joy!"
- — After getting a Ray Gun
Other
- "Alas, the doctor is too poor to buy this..."
- — When attempt to open a door without requisite points.
- "Dempsey, I hate you. I hate your ugly voice."
- — Randomly when Dempsey talks.
- "I hate you Dempsey. I even hate your eyes."
- — After witnessing Dempsey gets a kill.
- "Look at the big American hero needing help from the doctor"
- — After Dempsey comments about getting swarmed.
- "Dempsey made a crawler, now everyone can do it"
- — After Dempsey destroys a zombie's leg's
- "Ah, the bathroom, not a very intersting place, unless you're German... LIKE ME!!!"
- — Upon entering the bathroom at first floor.
- "Doctor Maxis almost had his undead army if only he could have broken the trust barrier."
- — Upon entering the dressing room.
- "They are shaking down the roof, what a pity!"
- — After the power is switched on.
- "I found a piece of the meteor!"
- — After found the first piece of the meteor.
- "I found another rock! Maybe they stole this from Japan..."
- — Finding the second piece of the meteor. Reference to the meteor in Shi No Numa
- "I have found a magnificent tune!"
- — Upon activating the "115" song easter-egg.
- "Oh look, its me... but not quite as magnificent!"
- — After examining his portrait.
- "Hello Dempsey. Oh, wait, its just a portrait... AN UGLY ONE!"
- — After examining Dempsey's portrait.
- "It's eyes are following me!"
- — After examining Nikolai's portrait.
- "Oh, it's a picture of the Monkey Bomb!"
- — After examining Takeo's portrait.
- "This one did not photograph so well."
- — After examining the blacked-out portrait.
Trivia
- PC game files reveal recorded quotes from all four characters referring to the Wunderwaffe DG-2 and the Flamethrower (which isn't a standalone weapon in the game). It is unknown why either were removed. Many of these cut quotes can be heard in maps that feature these weapons.
- There is a special quote said by Tank Dempsey. He says it occasionally when he's revived. The quote is "So they got a little lucky. WHAT?!" The special thing with this is that when he says "WHAT?!" he sounds just like Alex Mason.