LEAKED! CLASSIFIED AGENCY MEMO DETAILING FRANK WOODS'S RECENT VGA AWARD WIN!
DATE: December 11, 2010 MEMORANDUM TO: Richard Kain (ADDO/SAD) SUBJECT: SGT. FRANK WOODS / SPIKE VGA'S
It has come to our attention that former S.O.G. and Op-40 operative Sergeant Frank Woods was recently presented with the "Character of the Year" award at the 2010 Spike VGAs. This places the Agency in a precarious state of affairs due to the acclaim and public visibility this decoration brings to Sgt. Woods and, by association, peripheral operators working within the Special Activities Division and other black operation units.
Please find enclosed a highlight reel of Sgt. Woods's accomplishments during the Dragovich incident, which was used as testimony for the aforementioned honorary.
As you can see, the heroics of Frank Woods, though not in question, bring to public light far too many of the events that occurred between April 1961 and February 1968. Recent HUMINT provided a transcript of an eavesdropped conversation between Sgt. Woods and an associate of his by the name of James C. Burns following the events of 11 December 2010. Below is an excerpt of said transcript:
- BURNS: Frank, my man, the big winner, BMOC. How's it feel to be famous now?
- WOODS: How's it feel? Well let me fill in the blanks for you, friend. [Drinks beer; slams bottle on table.] My face on the TV. My name in the papers. Yeah, they pretty much blew my op status straight to hell. Why don't they just shoot me in the balls next time? Less painful. But, I would like to thank my mom, my agents, and Treyarch for all their support in helping me win this award. If it wasn't for mom's genes, I'd never be able to grow a 'stache like this baby.
In short, Sgt. Woods is well aware of the blowback involved with his sudden notoriety and is less than pleased with these developments despite his sardonic thanks to the contrary. Recommend full and immediate suppression of any and all media references to Sergeant Frank Woods. He is an extremely valuable asset and we cannot afford to have him compromised at this time.
Ryan Jackson - Special Assistant to ADDO/SAD